Ups And Downs (EddiexJuicy)

Months- Chapter 11

!!SH WARNING!!

Juicy POV

11 months have gone by since everything had happened. We all still made boys videos, but when we were done, we all went our separate ways. We never told the fans because none of us felt right giving them our personal life update. 

I have my own house now and my life has not been going too great. I was still torn over Eddie. I still love him, but i just can't forgive him. He hurt me really bad. 

We didn't need to make any videos today, so it was a quiet and peaceful night. Until Eddie called me. i usually don't pick up because Mully would tell me the video ideas. This time, i decided to pick up. 

(phone call) (E-Eddie J-Juicy)

J- "What do you want?"

E- "Hey Juice. I just called to see how you were doing."

J- "I'm fine."

E- "Okay."

The phone call was quiet for a second.

J- "Did you need anything else?"

E- "Yeah actually. Um, i wanted to see if you would like to hangout sometime."

J- "I'm busy."

E- "But, you, don't know when."

J- "I'm busy."

I hung up the phone. Why do i do this to myself? I decided i was going to get a beer. I got a beer and started drinking it. By the time i was done, i was really depressed. I don't have friends, i don't have anyone anymore. Besides Mully of course, but i wasn't really that close with him.

I went to the bathroom and grabbed my razor. i started cutting. I've done this a couple times after the breakup, but it's not like there anyoine to stop me anymore. it kind of felt good. I liked the pain. It made me feel like the pain inside my head went away.

I bandaged them up and then i heard a knock on my door. I wasn't expecting anyone so i was cautious. I crept up to the door and i saw, Eddie? Why was he at my house?

(Door opens)

J- "What are you doing here?"

E- "I wanted to check up on you."

J- "I'm fine now can you leave?"

E- "What happened to your arm? Juicy-"

J- "You're not my boyfriend anymore! You dont need to know!"

E- "Just tell me it's not what i think it is."

J- "I burned myself while cooking. Now go."

Eddie pushed himself into my house. I tried to stop him, but he is significantly stronger than me. 

J- "What the fuck! Get out of my house!"

E- "I know you're lying."

J- "Why do you care? You hurt me, remember?"

E- "I didn't want to Juice."

J- "I told you to stop calling me that."

E- "Is it because of me?"

J- "I burned myself while cooking Eddie. Stop trying to make up reasons to come into my house. Get out!"

Eddie got closer to me. Mine and his face were inches apart. My heart was beating really fast. I love him so much, but i don't want him near me.

E- "You don't know how to cook Juicy."

That's when it hit me, he really did care. How did he remember that? I only tried once when we were in high school. 

J- "Ed, you hurt me. I need you to respect my space. Stop trying to chase me back. I'm not ready to talk yet."

E- "I tried waiting. I also see that you did it a couple more times after me and you broke up. Just tell me it's not because of me."

I didn't want to hurt him, but he knows when i lie so what's the point.

J- "It is. You hurt me. I'm not ready to talk yet."

E- "Then don't talk."

We stood there, faces inches apart. I missed his smell, his voice, his everything. I just wanted him but i knew it would hurt me too bad. I also don't want to give him what he wants. I tried backing up, but he grabbed my waist and pulled me into him.

J- "I can't Eddie." My voice started breaking. "You really hurt me. I can't just forgive you."

E- (voice breaking) "I know. I just needed to hug you again. To make sure okay, just this once. I love you so much Juice. He didn't mean nothing to me. You mean the world to me. If something were to happen to you, and i couldn't protect you. I wouldn't be able to forgive myself."

I started crying. I know he means it, but i just can't. 

E- "It's okay. Like i said, I love you with every heartbeat."

I just kept crying. I couldn't stop. I love him. I want to be with him. I want to marry him, i just can't forgive him. What if he does it again?I calmed down a little bit.

J- "I believe you, i just, can't trust you, Eddie. After what happened, i just can't."

E- "Then i will spent the rest of my life making sure that no one else will make you feel that way. I will make sure that no one else makes you feel the way that i made you feel."

He let go of me and backed up a little. He wiped the tears off my face. He kissed my arm and then my forehead.

E- "Until next time, mi amor."

My heart broke. I watched him walk out the door and as soon as he shut the door i fell to my knees and bawled. I didn't want to move. I didn't want him to go. Him coming over hurt worse than what he did. Why can't he just leave me alone?

i went back to the bathroom and grabbed the razor. I just couldn't anymore. I didn't want to be alive anymore. 

Eddie POV 

I walked out the door and  i sat on the front porch. I couldn't just leave. I want to make it right. I know he won't forgive me, and i know he can't trust me, but is it really love if you don't fight for it? 

I got ripped out of my thoughts when i heard a thud come from inside. I ran through the door and didn't see Juicy anywhere. I heard him crying in the bathroom.

E- "Juicy? JUICY!"

J- "I don't want to do it anymore. I can't do it anymore. Just leave. Go away!"

E- "No. I'm not letting you go again. I won't let you go again."

I pulled out my phone and called 911. He cut his wrists. He went too far this time. 

E- "I'm so sorry Juicy. I love you so much."

I held cloths on his wrists until the ambulance came. When they came, i rode in the back to go to the hospital with him. I had to sit in the waiting room until they told me he was going to be okay. I called Josh, Mully, and Narrator to tell them what happened. This was all my fault.

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1120 words.