Slowly Becoming Mine

Slowly Becoming Mine (14)

Waliayh's P.O.V

"Shahmeer Bhai!" Ayra exclaimed running towards him followed by Maliha as I awkwardly hung around beside Amma not knowing what exactly I would say to him after so many years.

Shahmeer chuckled and hugged the two together. "You forgot about us!" Maliha exclaimed, Shahmeer kept them in his embrace for a while before letting go. "Did you bring gifts!" Malli asked to which he took out two nicely wrapped packages. "One is for you and the other-"

"Is also mine!" She interrupted him before running off followed by Ayra chasing her. "Malli!" She protested.

Shahmeer smiled at me as amusement played in his eyes at their behavior.  He walked over to Amma and I. "As-Salaam-Alaikum, Khala." He said before pulling her to a hug. "Bohot yaad aai aap sab ki." (I really missed all of you) Amma relaxed in his embrace and hugged him back.

"Wa-Alaikum-Salaam," Amma said softly, "Hum sab me bhi bohot yaad kiya tumhe" (We really missed you too.)

Shahmeer pulled back awkwardly standing in front of me. "How are you?" He asked me.  His eyes were frantically searching mine for answers. Unwillingly before he came I slipped my ring back on my finger as a way to get him to back off. I know he truly loved me, I did too in a naive way, but not the way I had fallen for Samar.

"I am good." I say softly smiling at him, "How are you?"

"Been good," he replied. Amma got the hint of leaving us pretending to go get snacks for us. Shahmeer breathed out heavily, "I am sorry about Amal, Haider told me about what had happened with you, Amal, and your husband Samar." 

Swallowing harshly, "It was hard." I respond, "But Samar and I are in a better place now."  I hated lying but to him it was necessary. "I am happy."

"I am happy that you are happy." Shahmeer set his bags down, "I hope he treats you just as I would have." Nowhere near to you would have treated me. Shahmeer promised me the world, and I knew back then he would do anything to deliver me the world, but the way he left me so easily put a doubt in my mind if this was all words.

"Shahmeer," I stop him, "it's been 10 years."

"I know." He whispered, "Sorry. I-I just thought that maybe you would have waited for me." In a way, I was before Samar had walked into my life. That is why I had such a chip on my shoulder around other men because my heart was waiting for him, but you know what they say, love comes unexpectedly. I had fallen in love with Samar completely unexpected.

"You couldn't have expected me to wait for so long." I say, "Shahmeer you didn't even answer my calls when you got to New York. What hope did you want me to hang on to?"

Shahmeer eyes filled with sadness, "Right." He sighed, "Sorry Wafa, truly."

"It's alright." I stood up straighter, "Let's not talk about the past anymore Shahmeer. I am happily married, and that's that. Let's focus on Ayra and Haider."  I turn to leave but he calls out my name once again stopping me in my tracks.  "What?"

"Can we at least be friends?" He asked. "I am only here for a little while and I do not want any awkwardness."

"Of course," I say, "We were friends before everything happened"

Shahmeer smiled, "Thank you."

I nodded and walked off into my room leaving the girls and Amma to entertain him. I look down at my hand and take off the ring once again resting it on my dresser. I am not ready for anyone else to come into my life, and now that Shahmeer is back I know Amma is going to start pushing him towards me. I wanted to stay away from all this for a long while, I wanted to find myself again, and being with a man was not going to help me. So for now this ring will help protect me, from Shahmeer, and any upcoming troubles.

. . .

As guests piled into the house I quickly helped Amma in the kitchen ready to serve them and set the table. "How was your talk with Shameer?"

"Amma." I say firmly, "Do not start."

Amma breathed out heavily, "Sorry." She mumbled. I do not know what obsession this lady has with wanting me to settle down before I even have gotten a divorce. "Wafa-"

"Amma!" I snapped, "I am stuck in this situation because of you, Amal, and her parents. I am not getting emotionally blackmailed anymore. I am not five anymore so no you cannot decide the things for me. I do not like Shahmeer, I am telling you right now. I am not even divorced and you are already trying to set me up with someone who lives in America. I am not leaving Pakistan, if I bother you so much I'll look for an apartment after the divorce."

"Wafa," Amma whispered shocked at my outburst, "Sorry. Do not say stuff like that. I won't bring up Shahmeer again, sorry." She panicked.

Breathing out heavily I look over at her I grab her hands, "I am sorry I shouldn't have spoken to you like that but I am serious. If you say or do anything regarding Shahmeer or Samar Amma, I will move out."

"I won't." Amma said, "I just want what's best for you."

"Yeah well for Amma, I need to be alone for a while." I lift up the tray again, "So let be me,"

Amma sadly nodded as I completely killed off all of her plans, I did not need another person attached to me, and I swear if Amma even tried to mention anything to Aayat Khala I am out of here. 

Smiling at the guests, I settled the food down on the tables and went to sit beside Ayra, Malli, and Api who were waiting for the Haider and his family to come, while I had no hope of seeing the Samar here, after how I had spoken to him the night before. 

"Bhai ko dekh rahi ho?" (Looking for Samar?) Ayra asked, 

"Sh," I hushed her, "Please do not start,"

She quickly quieted down when she heard I had a no-bullshit tone, I was really tired of everyone thinking they knew just exactly what I needed and how I needed it. I need time to breathe, and at times like I had told Amma, I felt like moving out, on my own.  Api looked at me sternly, "What?"

"It's her haldi," She said, "Be nice," Rolling my eyes at her, I readjusted my dupatta and sat back keeping quiet. The Mohammad family came in filling the room with brightness, as well as the Qureshi Family bringing Dua along with them. Api was cranky being away from Dua for so long, and I was cranky because of everyone's eyes on me.  As Amma and Baba welcomed, the two, my eyes caught Samar's who had surprisingly shown up tonight. I thought he wouldn't after our conversation. "Samar is here." Api announced, 

"And?" I say monotoned, 

Now it was Api's turn to roll her eyes at me, as she caught up to greet her husband, and daughter. Ayra looked over at me warily, "What Ayra?" I snapped, she physically flinched, "Speak."

"I know you told Shahmeer Bhai that you are happily married to Samar Bhai, but if he sees you sitting here angrily,  how will you be able to prove it?"

"I dont need to prove anything," I say firmly, "Nor to Shahmeer or Samar, just focus on your haldi and stop budding in my life Ayra."

"Api," She tried to defend herself, "I just-"

"Want what is best for me?" I finished her sentence, "Well maybe what is best for me Ayra if everyone just backs the fuck off. It's my life, I am going to decide, not you all." Ayra's gaze lowered, "Can't even sit in silence in this goddamn house." I said angrily standing up and walking away from her, the ceremony, and from the two men, that once were important to me. 

Baba always said to live for myself, and when I am trying to Amma, and my three sisters are making it hell. Maybe moving out is the best option, at least there won't be nagging every five seconds. . A woman always does not need a man in her life, sometimes being alone is the best thing... and that is where I am at right now. . .I just want to be alone.