CONQUEST • Negan

Not So Different

"Now, I just gotta figure out what in the hell I'm gonna do with you."

Negan had already showed me to my official room, which unfortunately wasn't the one I had woken up in yesterday with the vent that could've been my escape. This new room was attached to the area of the factory Negan dubbed the 'Wives Quarters'. Just the name of it turned my stomach, but further yet, the fact that he had decided to house me here was too much. I had publicly turned the man down and he still hadn't managed to catch a godamn hint.

I couldn't complain too much though because maybe Negan was right about that whole hierarchy in the sanctuary business and the Wives just being a peg below him on the food chain because this room was nice. Like a luxury of luxuries by apocalypse standards. And even better, I didn't have to share. The bed, which of course I had tested first, was soft as fuck, just how I liked it. I couldn't promise that I wouldn't have some late mornings 'cos of that thing. The bookcase was full. And even better, I could tell that this room had been designed by and for a woman since the shelves were stacked with smutty, angsty romance novels. This was a girl's wonderland, I had to admit it. If I could— if productivity wasn't still required of me— I would lock myself in this room and never leave. I would eventually starve or dehydrate, but I would die happy and thats all that really matters in the end.

I hated that I couldn't hide my delight from Negan well enough though. He had noticed, within an instant, how much I liked this room and I noticed,  almost instantly too, that he was proud of that fact. He was proud from the knowledge that he was providing for me, that he was making me happy, that he wasn't pissing me off for once— which just ended up pissing me off. I could tell all this by the way his chest puffed up a little, and he stood a little taller and broader, and his eyes kept tracking my exploration of the room. He was grinning the whole time too, which, too be fair, was a very typical trait of Negan's, the man loved to smile, but this one was different. It was a tender smile of satisfaction, as if he was getting some kind of kick out of seeing me pleased.

It was weird as hell and icked me out, but I'd take this Negan over, bat-swinging, head-bashing, dictatorial-psycho Negan any day of the week.

Negan had then made a point to show me to his room, that was all too conveniently the door across from mine. Mega odd. But I didn't miss how much bigger and grander his was either because, of course it was. The man was definitely compensating for something else. He had a godamn four-poster bed, black silk fucking sheets, a grand fireplace(in a factory?) and a vanity table which I would assume was for his wives but knowing Negan, that thing was probably one of his pastimes. Ridiculous, utterly ridiculous. And I made sure not to keep my feelings and opinions hidden either, which then, somehow managed puncture holes into that high Negan was riding off of after seeing how contented I was with my room. But he listened to my criticisms and nodded along as if he was actually taking mental notes.

"I'm surprised it doesn't absolutely reek of sex in here," I had commented flippantly whilst picking through the books on his shelf. A much smaller collection than my own but a decent one still, full of old classics and even some philosophers which was funny cause I didn't even know the man could read.

"That's 'cos I don't bed my wives in here. I sleep here, I relax here, but I keep my sex life separate."

I then scoffed, "Oh, so you're suddenly too proper to have sex in a bed?" The Art of War? I might borrow that one.

"In my bed." He clarified. "Doesn't stop me from fucking them in their beds. But only if I'm invited, which you seem to think isn't something that I wait for. I don't even have a key to their rooms."

"Some happy marriage, you've got. Marriages, sorry."

I picked up another book. 'Leviathan by Thomas Hobbes'. Why am I not surprised that Negan read this political theory that believes in the importance of maintaining one, single sovereignty over the state? It definitely plays into his fantasies of being the emperor. I read it in college and found it unappealing. Won't be borrowing that one.