"Well, howdy! I'm Cletus! Welcome to Heaven! Guess you did somethin' good to get here, and good people deserve to give loved ones special blessin's!"
🎵Does it make you want to cry?🎵
🎵When your loved one has to die?🎵
🎵Does it hurt you through and through?🎵
🎵When your face is turnin' bluuuuue🎵
🎵Well, luckily for you...🎵
🎵There's somethin' we can do!🎵
🎵We can help keep them alive,🎵
🎵So you can watch them thrive!🎵
🎵'Cause here at C.H.E.R.U.B!🎵
🎵We'll save your honeybun from dying violently!🎵
🎵‘Cause here at C.H.E.R.U.B.!🎵
🎵No, we never even ask a fee!🎵
🎵Because good people spread the love!🎵
🎵And we're here for all above!🎵
🎵We do the paperwork for you!🎵
🎵And the heavy liftin', too!🎵
🎵So sit right back🎵
🎵And let us bless a soooul for you!🎵
🎵Oh, we... are the C.H.E.R.U.B--
BLAM!
Blitz shot at the old TV with his flintlock, having enough of the overly sugary saturated knock-off commercial.
"Nice one, B!" Millie praised enthusiastically, as you cheered joyfully in her arms, clapping at the bright lights.
"Gimme another, Mox."
Moxxie then sweeps away the flaming debris replaces puts another old-fashioned TV onto the stand, switching it on nervously as he awaits his boss's reaction as it shows 666 News logo.
"Eh, nah. Not feeling it." Blitz notes as he pours gunpowder into his flintlock. "Next!"
Moxxie switches the channel, this time a demoness similar to Betty Boop appears on screen in black and white, dancing erotically with large, bouncing breasts censored only by tape Xs, holding a pitchfork. Millie is quick to cover your eyes as Blitz looks on with a bored expression.
"Uh-huh. Keep going, keep goin', keep goin'..."
Moxxie switches the channel yet again, this time showing local businessimp Wally Wackford appears on the screen dressed in a white suit with a black top hat, holding a cane.
"I say, I say, are you lookin' to get work making crazy contraptions and goofy gadgets"
He whacks his cane on the wall at either side of him, producing the graphics for "CRAZY CONTRAPTIONS" and "GOOFY GADGETS" as he speaks.
"WELL, call me at Wacky Wally Wackford's Wacky Idea Factory,"
The title, "Wacky Wally Wackford's Wacky Idea "Factory" ™" on a circular background, similar to that of old, classic cartoons you'd sometimes watch. The panel with the title then falls over forwards, landing with a cartoonish BONK!
"Where you make the things and I make the money!"
He then moves close to the screen, his grin falling into a pleading puppy dog eyed stare.
YOU ARE READING
Helluva Child
Fanfiction⚠️mature content⚠️ Just.... Helluva Boss, only you're millie and moxxie's (very special) miracle child. [Literally a spin-off of "Helluva Hound"]
