Stop and Stare

22

"What will you do next? What do you envision as your next adventure?" Brad asked Mahony, he sat with his back against the bar and started people watching.

"I don't know, I just," Mahony rubbed the back of his neck, "it just isn't fair. I've done everything I'm supposed to do, followed the rules, worked hard; hell, I didn't even give in to temptations, not much anyway ... look where it got me," he said exhaling heavily.

"Man, Dave," Brad turned his head and eyed Mahony sideways, "don't tell me you've never heard people say that life isn't fair?"

"Of course, I've heard that before."

"Then what's the problem?"

"There's no satisfaction," Mahony finally said after a long pause. He didn't want to say it out loud, he didn't even want to admit to himself even though he knew the answer ever since he got to the In-between.

"What? Not seeing Lisa punished?"

"That's a big one but it's about," Mahony let out a breath, "I'm that guy that saved the best for last, you know, saving that favorite piece of a meal to eat at the very end."

"You've saved and saved and now you didn't get to eat it," Brad finished the thought for Mahony. "What have you been saving to savor?"

Mahony smirked bitterly. "That's the problem. I haven't even gotten to the meal yet. I've just been preparing, waiting for the right moment to start cooking."

"I hate to say it but you waited a tad too long to get started."

"That's stating the obvious." Mahony rubbed the back of his neck again.

"I think I know what your real problem is," Brad said, "you still don't know what that perfect meal looked like, don't you?" Mahony didn't answer. "I knew it!" Brad turned towards Mahony, "There are no perfect meals, not unless you start cooking."

"I don't follow," Mahony said.

"How are you going to perfect it if you don't ever start? There's never going to be the right time or the right conditions. The way I see it is you either roll with what you've got or you," Brad spread his hands at Mahony, "ended up sitting here, in a bar of the In-between, lamenting over the unfairness of it all."

"If you have it all figured out, how did you ended up here, in a bar of the In-between, sitting with a guy bitching and moping over not eating that favorite piece?" Mahony said, although not intended as a jab at Brad but as soon as he'd said it, he felt he'd done Brad dirty.

"The truth is, I'm greedy," Brad admitted.

"You don't have to—"

"It's fine, it's something I need to come to terms with as well," Brad said. "I couldn't get enough of the experience. Unlike you I want to try all the meals that're available and eat the best piece first."

"I see."

"It's exciting, when that flavor hit, god, what an experience," Brad said, eyes shining with possibilities. I'm already thinking maybe I should be a high-powered general in my next adventure, calling the shots to life and death situations. A knife in my back, plunging to my death, I didn't see it coming but what if I can, what'll that be like?"

"You can't be serious. You really want to experience that?" Mahony said with no small amount of apprehension unable to reconcile the horror of the scenario Brad just described in his own mind.

"Don't get me wrong, I've been in the trenches before in one of these rides but I think I've never been the one strategizing and making the difficult decisions," Brad said.