Standing In The Dark

SITD 1 - Flashbacks

DJ's POV

It's all in my head. Everything.

From the first day I met her, from the day we became friends till eventually best friends.

But most importantly....the day I started courting her. Can she still remember it? Cause I do. It's like a tattoo, it's in my heart and mind and I can't seem to get it out. Get my point?

*7 years ago*

"Kath.....I have something to tell you."

"What is it?" I laughed because her mouth was filled with food. Burger to be specific.

"Uh.....well....uhm...." I nervously uttered.

Goodness, DJ. What is wrong with you? DON'T BE A COWARD.

"Pardon?"

"Can I.....like.......court you?" Finally. I can breathe properly now.

"But......"

"It's ok. If you don't like me back, don't force yourself please." I said, trying hard not to make my voice crack.

"Fine. Yes, you may."

It took seconds before it absorbed in my brain. (I don't think that's the right term for it but you can guess my point right?)

Can someone pinch me right now? Like, is this real life or just a fantasy? If it's a dream, I don't ever wanna wake up.

"Uhm...hello? Earth to DJ?"

"Oops! Sorry. But seriously Kath?!"

"Dead serious."

I did a fist pump.

"Thank you! Thank you!" I run into her then hugged her as tight as I could.

I never wanna let her go.

"Deej, I can't breathe!"

"Oops! Sorry. Thank you again, Kath. You don't know how happy I am right now."

Yes, no one could describe what I'm feeling right now. It's more than just butterflies and rainbows and whatever...It's a lot more than that.

*end of flashback*

Wow. Looking back, I wish I was as happy as I was then than I am now.

Here I am again, thinking about you. Wondering if I'll ever see you again. Sigh. Why on earth did I break up with you?

But the real question is.......why am I so stupid?

I still remember that night though. As if it was yesterday. When in reality, it's been 5 years.

*5 years ago*

"Kath....I'm breaking up with you." I said calmly as possible.

"Pardon?!" Oh no.

"You heard me."

"Wow. And care to tell me why?"

".....I never really loved you, Kath." I lied.

"Wow. Newsflash, DJ. We've been dating for 2 years. And you tell me, you don't love me?"

"......"

"Goodbye."

Before I could even explain and stop her, she left, without another word.

I punched the wall.

"DJ, why are so stupid?!" I scolded myself.

Do you know why I broke up with her?

Well you see, I really wanted to know if she does love me. And I thought that if I break up with her, and if she really loves me, she would stop me right?

But if you come to think of it, that was a horrible plan.

*end of flashback*

Oh goodness. I was so stupid back then.

Was my mind on drugs or something?

Suddenly a song played on the radio.

"Here's the thing,

We started as friends,

It was cool but it was

all pretend....."

And upon hearing the song, I stood frozen.

That voice.....the voice I have been longing for. The voice I loved to hear....

It was her.