Submission : BDSM Short Stories

One - Each Others Firsts

      I always knew I was different.

      I never wanted a happily ever after with fluffy clouds and rainbows and singing flowers. I never wanted the happy marriage, the white picket fence or the dog. I wanted the depraved beasts from every book to come take me and use me until I couldn't move without being reminded of the glorious torture they bestowed upon me.

        I didn't want the white picket fence, I wanted to be tied up to the white picket fence. I want the rope to dig into my skin and leave marks for days, I want to feel the pain with each breath I take. So yes, I always knew I was different even if when I was younger I didn't know it was any different from the social norm we as a society have created.

        I guess it started when I was a little girl and instead of playing families with my dolls I was playing BDSM games.  I'd tie my dolls up, of course both the men and woman dolls would change roles every once in a while because what eight year old doesn't like inclusion? It wasn't until I was a teenager that I realised this isn't normal and not every little girl had dolls with sharpie handcuffs. It's taken me a long time and a lot, and I mean a lot of research to figure out I'm a masochistic little bitch.

       I never thought I'd ever find people like me, I am a total loner. If you don't talk to me I won't talk to you, I can't hold a conversation to save my life, so when I was adopted by an extrovert on my first day at university well I took the chance given to me. One day while she was drinking she told me she was into pet play, she said she hadn't told me before because I expressed a fear of furry's. Now it's not the people it's the eyes of the large masks, I'm the same with a lot of teddies and as pathetic as it sounds, mascots. The eyes fucking follow me man it's not right! Anyway, sorry, we got onto talking about how she dresses up as a cat. She got out all of her equipment and kept me touch it, that's when I explained that I was into bondage. She, my friend with more sexual experience than me, just looked at me and laughed.

       "You're a virgin, how can you know?" She cackled.

       "I may not have had sex with someone but I've pleasured myself plenty of times!" I snapped feeling embarrassed. I've been horny since I was seventeen but I've never wanted to directly have sex with anyone, mainly due to my lack of social interaction and due to the fact that I don't find people attractive. I know people are conventionally fuckable buy it's lost I'm translation that I should want to fuck them.

       I was raised by a single mother who was very open about sex yes, but she didn't let me wear revealing clothing. I can't even wear vest tops too low because it shows what pathetic excuse for a cleavage I have. It's a sore point for me, I as a person am incredibly boring. I don't drink or smoke, or really have sex. I just fantasise about people tying me up and fucking me without any regard for what I want.

       "I'm sorry Mel, you know I love you but I'm quite shocked, I never expected you to be into BDSM," she said gesturing to me. I looked down at myself, I was wearing one of my dads old t-shirts that were older than me with the sleeves cut off and biker shorts. I crossed my arms unsure of what she was meaning, just because I dress masculine doesn't mean I don't want to be put in my place.

        I just raised my brows, during this conversation I have been completely sober while my friend, poor innocent Kyla was drunk out of her brains on the cheapest wine we could find at Aldi.

       "I want to be tied up but I want to feel safe too, like, when was the last time I told you I had a crush on someone?" I asked.