Emeralds - RoGan - Wolverine and Rogue

OneShot - Emeralds (esmeraldas)

I didn't know the reason why I always got lost in those green eyes...
When I thought I had seen her for the first time, in some kind of school for misfits - like me - I couldn't disguise how much she captivated me, those two emeralds...
Those same emeralds told me how girls flirted with the 'bad boys' but ended up marrying the nice guys...
What a reality check!
And they were still present when I drove my claws into her chest and the Phoenix effect vanished, leaving only her grateful smile for me.
How could she?!
Thanking me for killing her?!
But that's what Ororo said, and she knew it too: only I would be capable of doing that for her, of getting so close and, in that moment, feeling free to declare all my love and do what needed to be done!
God! How I hated myself in that moment.
How I hated YOU at that hour!
If I were religious, I would question why so many trials, but I don't go that far...
Lost in the forest. Back to my origins.
Despite the surroundings, I couldn't forget for a second the reason for my departure: to be away from civilization, to distance myself from the X-Men so I wouldn't have to kill any more of them!
Everyone I get close to ends up dead...
Either by me or by my enemies...
And in that mansion, I had so much to lose. - Rogue's image assaults my mind, forcing me to refocus on Jean Grey's death.
The nights in the forest were shortened by massive nightmares, full of guilt.
Wasn't there any more serum vials spread all over that floor?
Couldn't I have approached her mutant Leech? Was killing the only solution?...
However, on one of the nights, after needing to reinforce the cabin's construction for the upcoming snow and having watched a spectacular sunset, the nightmares eased up.
My mind sought some kind of redemption, showing me a totally new image, unknown to this reality but still very real in its time.In the 1970s, during the Weapon X experiments, there was a moment when I, inside the cell where I was, smelled something as sweet as almonds, heard three voices discussing what was inside the prison where I was, whether an animal or a man, and heard her sweet voice affirming: 'it's not an animal, it's a man, they turned him into some kind of weapon'.
Then, the door opened and I did what I do best, I killed everyone who crossed my path, I was focused on finding Stryker's scent and killing the bastard too, but I lost him, minutes after getting the freshest trail up to that moment, it was some kind of command room!
I was so angry, hateful to be more exact, not knowing who I was, not having good memories in my head to guide me in this moment of pure tension.
I found a door leading outside and before fully opening it, I smelled her again. I turned around, and as I was about to slaughter, something warm invaded my mind, something almost made of fire, it was possible to feel its heat, but without burning, and that's when I felt her voice inside my head, saying 'I can help you.'
Instinctively, my whole body calmed down, I withdrew my claws, but remained alert.
All of this could be another act to capture me and do other horrible things to me.
That's when her eyes fell on mine, the first time - truly - that I got lost in the vastness of Jean Grey's green soul, back then, a young adult...
She could make of me whatever she wanted, could ask me anything and I would have done it all for her, anything, instead, she gave me the greatest gift since all that hell began!
She retrieved the memory of the moment where I was chopping wood for Rose's stove and, along with that memory, several little ones followed, filling my senses, making me understand that not everything had been just suffering and pain.
I now knew a little of my origin and could try to find that place and the people from those memories!
I thanked her with my gaze, intoxicated by her eyes, so similar to the forests I love so much, and left, without looking back!
My brain, after so many years, gave me this memory as a gift, the memory of the first encounter between Weapon X and Jean Grey...
Of course, at the time I didn't know that nearly a century had passed and all those people were dead! But there were some things I knew, thanks to her: my name was Logan and I was a mutant.
After that, I spent a few years among wolves, wandering, before stumbling upon Alpha Flight; I left because I refused to be manipulated by suited politicians and ended up going from bar to bar, picking fights for money and sometimes even without getting paid for it.
The fact is, I didn't feel part of anything, and the growing fear of mutants only fueled my anger towards the human race...
Until that last bar, before meeting the X-Men, where I met Rogue.
I woke up from that dream, if I can call it that, with the clear sensation of how those emeralds, all of them, Rose, Jean, and Rogue, guided me to the present moment.
And before them, the green of the forests, always present in my life.
I'm still groggy, but with such a good feeling inside me, as if the green of the forests were the continuation of those who are gone and the presence of that still so alive in me.
I don't forget the way Rogue described feeling me inside her, while we discussed whether she would give the folks at the mansion a chance... I really wanted to get lost in those emeralds at that moment, but I thought about what a big problem that would be for her, because I could fall into a coma in front of those humans, inside the train.
So, I just hugged her, and Magneto arrived and kidnapped her, without me being able to fulfill my recent promise of not letting anything bad happen to the girl...
I could have lost Rose, I could still be mourning Jean, but Rogue was alive!
The last time I saw her, I gave her some friendly advice: 'if you want to seek the mutant cure, do it for yourself and not for some boy, I didn't stop her, and now I know it was because of the immense internal desire to touch her!
It was still dark outside, Nature still slept, but I didn't want to wait for morning. I ran out to the van, heading for the Xavier Institute for Gifted Youngsters, and I arrived there just in time for breakfast.
I sneaked in, knowing all the surveillance points of the place. I saw many faces, smelled many scents, but I didn't get the reception I expected, Marie wasn't there to meet me...
When I caught Bob's scent, I ran to him, and when the students noticed me, they were startled by my wild appearance. I really wasn't having the best of days.

- Where's Rogue, kid?! - I asked through gritted teeth.

- Logan! You're back! Wow, good to see you too... - he replied, sarcastically.

- Don't give me that, where's the girl? I don't smell her, Bob!... - I complained, more to myself...

- It's because she's not at the mansion, Logan. Since you disappeared, she's been looking for you, bonehead... - he said, as his fist turned icy, and before I could guess, a well-aimed punch hit me in the jaw.

The students ran out of the kitchen, frightened. While I realized, from the look of pain on the boy's face, that the punch hurt him more than it did me.

- What the hell, Logan! After you came back from the city, she lost her powers. I told her I shouldn't have done that, that I didn't want that... She said she didn't do it for me and kissed me. - he explained, while massaging his hand, now flesh and bone - And then she broke up with me! She asked about you right after and I, very jealous, mentioned your escape because you killed Jean. - I growled at the casual way he said that. As if it were some kind of revenge, with emphasis on "killed". After that, he shrunk, asked for a truce. - I messed up, okay? I apologize... But I didn't think she'd be so determined to find you! I just wanted her to give up... well, on you... to be with me.

- Well, you can't control these things, huh, kid? People's reactions are individual... Has it been long since she left?

- Yeah, it has, I've never seen her so determined about something - Iceman commented, defeated.

- And you didn't go after her, why not, kid? Now she's defenseless, you didn't care?

He didn't respond verbally, shook his head as he lowered it in shame. I grunted loudly, making him look at me, and I said:

- If something happened to her, I'll come back, okay? So, you better pray... - and I left before getting any response or excuse. I ran towards the Med Lab, if anyone could help me, that person was Hank.
I found the 'furry ball' engrossed in some book, hanging upside down from a bar on the ceiling. He had his back to the door, but he didn't take long to recognize my scent:

- My goodness, Logan! Wherever you've been, they clearly don't have showers, my dear?

It was the first time in months that I had any reflective surface to look at myself, and indeed, I understood the reason for the students' stares in the kitchen:

- I've been taking river baths, Hank. There's no deodorant out there...

And then he detached from the ceiling, closed the book, and stared at me:

- How are you, my friend? How can I help?

That's what I liked about the big blue guy. He never judged - except by my smell - and was always ready to help:

- I'm still grieving, but I realized that there are some things, and people, in life worth returning to society for, Hank... I need to know if there's a telepath in this school who can locate a human for me, you know?

- Hum... That's good, very good, my friend. This human wouldn't happen to have a streak of white hair, would she?

I smiled at the big guy's perceptiveness and nodded affirmatively.

- In that case, we won't need to go far, my dear. She left a cell phone number and asked that you only use it if you returned to the mansion. So, we can say she understands you better than all of us combined, right? Because I thought you'd never set foot here again...

My eyes widened, and I kept my mouth in a grimace, waiting for him to make the much-needed call.

- Oh! Of course! The call. I think it's better for you to talk to her yourself, Logan. - he pulled out his cellphone from his pocket, searching for the number, handing me the device already in the middle of the call, and went to another corner of the Med Lab.

- Hello, Hank? What happened? Any news about him? - one could detect the anxiety in her voice.

I stayed silent for a while, listening to her breathing like a symphony until she broke the silence:

- Logan?... - she asked softly.

I took a deep breath and threw out a familiar phrase between us:

- Are you running away again, darlin'?...

And she started crying on the other end, babbling words, but overall, meaning that she knew about my return and how happy it made her.

- Where are you? I need to see you, Marie... - I said, panicked at the thought that her response might mean a greater distance than my anxiety could handle.

- Call Hank, Logan, or put it on speaker, please!

I found the request strange, but I complied, putting it on speaker while calling the big blue guy over:

- Can you call Ylliana, Hank? I'm a few days away from Westchester, but I think she can help us, right?

- Well thought out, my dear! I'll go look for Colossus's sister right away.

I raised an eyebrow, since when did Colossus have a sister? And enrolled in the School?

- Can I do a video call, Logan? - the anxious voice of the southern girl questioned.

- Sure thing, darlin', sure thing.And it didn't take a minute for the phone to ring again. I answered, also eager to see her face. Both of us were taken aback by what we saw:

- Logan, what happened to you? Where have you been?

- I was worried about you too just now, darlin'! Is everything okay? I... I've been lost, you know? But now I'll be able to get back on track with your help...

She smiled at my statement. If there was any doubt about my return to the mansion, it was gone now. Her face, seconds before aged and tired, lit up, and I could recognize the Rogue that I had let pass through the 'cure' door.

- Everything is fine now, Logan... I hope to be able to help you and also get help. This whole situation of being normal is very strange to me, you know? Because, despite being able to touch people, I still feel those I had contact with, Cody, you, Magneto, Bob... and it's like you guys are part of what I am too, it's very strange.

Hank appears, accompanied by a slender, blonde mutant. He introduces us and explains the situation. Rogue talks to her on the phone, and as she nods her head, she comments:

- Look, Rogue, I understood everything you told me, yes, but as I know you a bit, I think it's better for this guy here to take a good shower before meeting you. He smells like moose dung mixed with bear drool, and I don't think you deserve that, friend...

As she said those words, I started to get indignant, and I only didn't get too pissed off with the blonde because it elicited an authentic laugh from Marie, one of those that I loved to hear, given their rarity:

- Go on, buddy, take a shower, change your clothes, and maybe tidy up that beard and hair, huh... - Ylliana quipped, handing me back the cellphone where I could see the brunette's astonished face.

- Logan, sorry... I forgot to mention how straightforward Ylliana is, you know? I don't care about any of that stuff, and we both know there's no point in grooming the beard and hair because they'll just grow back right away, but if you think you need the rest, even to calm our anxiety, what do you think? You get ready from your end, and I'll get ready from here, alright?

I let out a satisfied growl and nodded:

- See you soon, darlin'. - I handed the cellphone to Hank and asked if there was still a guest room, went to my van, grabbed the only change of clean clothes there, and truly let my anxiety wash away with the shower water. I combed my hair and beard, used some of Hank's perfume, and in less than 40 minutes, I was ready to meet those green gems again and wouldn't let go of them for anything in this world!

I step out of the bathroom and walk a bit until I realize the blonde mutant was sitting at the vanity, waiting for me:

- Ah! Now you look like a person, not a wild boar! Not even my demons smelled like you, Mr. Logan!... - and she let out a loud laugh.

- What the hell, girl?! Don't you know who you're talking to? - I lost my composure, demanding a minimum of respect - And what's with the 'demon' talk?

- Of course I do, sir. Talking to the mutant to whom I probably owe my life, right? We all do, but most of us also feel gratitude for the sacrifice made... There's a class taught by Prof. Ororo solely about you. - I smiled at that affirmation - And, perhaps partly my fault, I had an idealized image that was almost destroyed when I entered the Med Lab! And, knowing how much Marie cares about you, I didn't want her to see you at your worst, you know? I might have used the wrong means, but the ends are satisfactory. Now I know she'll meet the 'knight in shining armor' she so desires. And not his goat! - I growl at that last sentence. I was almost accepting her broken apologies... - And as for demons, well, I'm currently ruling the Limbo, so I live surrounded by demons when I'm there. In fact, I am one of them when in that reality... Through the Mystic Sword - and she materialized it in front of me - I can teleport to anywhere, in this and other dimensions, so with the coordinates Marie gave me, we'll be with her in the blink of an eye. - and then, she 'cut' through reality in front of us with the sword, and upon entering that new environment, her outfit changed to a black armor, with a helmet with horns, a strong smell of sulfur hit my nostrils, and I followed her, catching a very quick glimpse of Limbo, as she repeated the motion and left me in the parking lot of a motel:

- Her room is 13A, Mr. Logan. - pointing to a room on the ground floor, a few meters away from us - I don't even need to say how special she is to me, right? I'll keep an eye out... - And her eyes, once blue, turned yellow, with red edges, and a wicked smile spread across her lips before disappearing.

I was overjoyed to know that, if I were absent for any reason, Marie wouldn't be left alone. But now I was there... so why couldn't my feet move, my hands were sweating, and my heart was racing so fast that I could feel what it's like to have a heart attack? I swallowed hard, because I had no saliva left, and if I were to follow my instincts, I would have run away from there! Since it wasn't a moment for fighting, fleeing was the only option for all that adrenaline.*

song "Desire" by Ryan Adams*

The bright light from the room allowed me to see her silhouette, finishing fixing her hair, and since I wouldn't be able to do that alone, I yelled her name, the sound coming out faltering but audible. She appeared at the window, a big smile on her face. That served as fuel for my body to move, closing the gap between us as she opened the door and stepped out into the hallway.
We hugged, I was wearing a tank top and she was in a strappy top. Our skins touching safely, for the first time. I took a strong sniff of her neck, which made her laugh and pull away slightly:

- That tickles, Logan!

I couldn't speak. As soon as I looked at her, I was silenced by how much maturity and beauty emanated from her eyes. She was radiant! And that radiation from her passed to me, making me feel weak in the knees. Sensing something different, she fully withdrew from the embrace and cast a sad look:

- I'm sorry about Jean, Logan... - she couldn't hold back a tear, while I couldn't hold up the weight of my body any longer and fell to my knees in front of her, crying as well, hugging the girl around the waist. After a short while, she stroked my hair and hugged me tighter, whispering that everything would be okay and that those we love really leave a painful longing.

I exorcised my demons at that moment, and, taking a deep breath, I raised my head to look into her eyes again:

- I've been hiding in the past for a long time, you know? I don't want to live there anymore, Marie, that's why I came looking for you at the mansion. I may have lost many loves, because I'm almost immortal, or because of choices, which I still don't know if they're right or wrong, but I don't want to lose you because of some stupid fear of hurting you! I promised to take care of you before, and I'm still firm in my promise, darlin'!

She smiled sideways, stopped holding the emeralds on me, and looked ahead:

- You understand me better than anyone else, Logan... And you made me think a lot with that friend talk about the 'cure', you know? - and looking back at me, she concludes: Now more than ever, I'm going to need you to take care of me, to be patient with me and to allow me, too, to go through my current grief, because without my powers, I've lost something very important!

I stand up, tuck her white strand of hair behind her ear while the Southern girl places her hand over mine, making me touch her face and closing her eyes, forcing me to shift focus to her perfectly shaped and red lips. I pull her roughly closer and she lets out a little scream as I kiss her, initially with some anxiety, but then the contact with her calms me down, to the point where I stop kissing and just hold her, lightly, it was something so commonplace for other people, but being able to be like this, skin to skin, for so long, without risks, was such a good feeling:

- I could stay like this for the rest of my life, darlin'... - I whispered in her ear, breathing deeply afterward, feeding off her almost citrusy, unique scent.

She doesn't respond verbally, snuggling her face even more into my chest while her previously still hands start to lightly massage my back, as she lets out a muffled giggle and comments:

- I could too, Logan, if my life wasn't so much shorter than yours and I didn't have so many curiosities to satisfy, my dear...

I raised an eyebrow while smiling. She seemed innocent and somewhat defenseless, but she was already a young woman, one of the most assertive ones I knew. I didn't move to see what her next move would be, just relaxed the embrace a bit, giving her space to move better, and her arms then slid over mine, her left hand intertwined with mine, and she disengaged, leading me into the room and sitting me on the bed, while she locked the door; she did all of this with a calmness that only made me more eager. She took off her top and approached me, standing between my legs, while I put my hands on her waist, feeling her pheromones, hearing her breathing and her heart race, I noticed her blushing while her hands didn't quite know where to touch:

- Girl, there's no right or wrong now, do what's in your heart, I promise to go slowly, but there's nothing to be ashamed of, you know? You just need to be sure of what you want.

She then lifted her face, again the emeralds staring at me, but behind them there was a spark that I had never seen in Marie, her hands went to my belt, undoing it firmly, as they searched for my shirt to take it off and this brought our faces closer, without our eyes seeking anything else, she whispered, defeated:

- I'm sure!

I didn't need anything else, I helped her take off my shirt, while she caressed my chest and I stood up so that my pants fell and I could take off hers.
Despite the urgency, because of the pent-up desire for so long, being with her kept me calm like I had never been before. We spent the night and the following day getting to know each other in various ways until we fell asleep in each other's arms, with our legs entwined, exchanging the warmth of our bodies.
I was the first to wake up, but I imagined how, without a healing factor, she must be tired and respected her rest. I never tired of looking at her, even with her eyes closed and, after almost an hour, she woke up, smiling first and then opening her eyes. I took the opportunity to stroke her long hair while she stretched:

- Good morning, Logan!

- Marie. - I greeted with a nod.

She brought her lips to my eye and kissed it delicately:

- It felt like I was in a sea of delights, how many times I got lost in those blue eyes, I want more, I want always... - and she let out a contented laugh.

I was taken aback by that declaration. But if she wanted more, I wasn't going to hold back. I kissed her again and was about to start loving her again when she lightly tapped on my bare chest:

- I really want to start over, but I think I need to eat something first, Logan, and I'm not sure if a minibar will be enough...

That's when I realized I didn't know where we were, even though I didn't find that place and those smells entirely strange.

- Where are we? This place isn't entirely unfamiliar to me...

She smiled as she wrapped herself in the sheet to look for her clothes:

- That's right... You came by teleportation. We're in Canada, in Dundurn. I received a clue that you could be in Alberta, so I was going there. But before that, I had already traveled half of America looking for you. It shouldn't have been that hard to find you, sir...

I smiled genuinely at her, that had been the most amazing thing anyone had ever done for me. I felt my face warming up:

- Oh, darlin', my past forced me to be good at erasing my tracks... Since it wasn't beautiful women who were looking for me, but assassins and mercenaries!

- Oh! So if they were beautiful women, you'd let them find you? - not hiding the jealousy in her voice.

I laughed out loud, as I hadn't done in a long time. That goddess could have any man on Earth, mutant or not, she had chosen me and still managed to be jealous of me? Had I died? I even went through Limbo... Or was this some hallucination of a sadistic mutant?

- Marie, you don't need to be jealous. If it were in my past, before I met you, I would definitely let beautiful women find me. Now, I only have eyes for you, don't worry, I'll continue to hide my tracks very well.

- Hm, I see... - and she walked to the shower, letting the sheet fall, in a clear invitation for me to join her. What a woman!

- I thought you were hungry... - I headed for the shower with her.

- I am, but I mistook what for... I'm almost certain it's you, kitten!

I growled with pleasure and as we made love, she whispered my name, saying she loved me. My agreement was so quick that even I was surprised. My convictions and certainties gave way before that woman and I didn't see myself as weak or diminished because of it, on the contrary. Thinking of someone like her loving me gave me more strength to fight for a world where that would never end. And where other mutants and humans could have what we have...
She finished washing, bathed me too, and before we went out to eat something, I knew, when her eyes, with smile lines, looked at me, that from now on, the emerald was my favorite thing. And that the world could shrink, grow, or end, as long as I had refuge in her eyes and skin.