LEARNING TO FORGIVE YOU

7.

["I'm going to get your mom back, I promise."]

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A couple of minutes after Chris's breakdown, they decided to leave it in the past and move on, so they returned to having random conversations. Most of the topics they talked about were things Chris asked about Alex's time back in high school. She told him all about how she was a star athlete on the men's basketball team and that at some point, she even started to get scouted. At first, Chris was a little confused as to why she had played on the men's team instead of the women's. But he understood after she explained to him that she was intersex and had a better chance of getting drafted if she played with boys.

"Hey, can I ask you something?" Chris questiond, looking a bit hesitant. Alex nodded, signaling for him to go on. "When did you decide to get clean? Nick said that you have been for, like, over a year now."

Alex sighed, knowing that this question would come up someday. "2 years ago, 6 months after my graduation to be more specific, my mom got into a car accident. When my dad got the news, he was devastated. On that day, he needed me more than ever, but I was too high off my ass to even comprehend the fact that my mother had died." She paused releasing a deep breath, a pained chuckle leaving her mouth. "When he finally managed to share the news, the guilt of leaving him alone consumed me. I tried to numb those feelings by pomping my veins full with heroin and ended up overdosing. Unable to handle the stress of my overdoses and the grief of losing my mom, my dad took his own life. I found him the day I was released from the hospital, his brains splattered across our living room walls."

She looked down fidgeting with her hands, when she felt a lone tear roll down her face. She quickly wiped it, sniffing her nose before looking back up at Chris who looked at her with wide, saddened eyes. He hadn't expected such a heavy story, and it left him momentarily speechless.

"That's why you also stopped hanging around with him. You were scarred to fall back ino old patterns." Chris said, more as an observation than a question.

She nodded in confirmation. "I just knew he wouldn't understand. When i went to him right before rehab he was so high he couldn't even understand that both of my parents were dead. Just like i couldn't the day my mother died."

As she spoke, she heard a throat clearing behind her, causing both of them to turn their heads toward the person standing there.

"My mom was, um, wondering where you two had gone." Alicia said, standing beside the pool with her arms crossed, her gaze fixed on Alex. Her eyes softened slightly at the sight of the older girl's red eyes, a clear sign that she had been crying. "But i see you're just messing around in our dead neighbours pool, so..."

"Just trying to have a little normalcy." Chris responded, floating around in the pool. Alex nodded in agreement but kept her head down, to hide her current broken state.

Alicia nodded slightly, her gaze fized on Alex trying to see if she was okay. "Mhm, okay. Well, your dad wondered if the two of you could talk." She said, turning her gaze onto Chris as she pointed at him.

Chris looked at Alex to see if she was fine with him leaving. She nodded at him with a soft smile, her eyes back to normal. The boy got out of the pool with a sigh, before drying himself off and putting on his shirt to go talk with his father.

Once Chris left, Alicia remained standing at the pool's edge, staring down at Alex, who had begun to float around once more.

Alex noticed the younger girl's gaze and smiled slightly, placing her chin on one of the pool noodles. "Would you like to join me?" she asked, looking up at Alicia. "The water feels nice." she added.