Being Supreme Chancellor of the Republic wasn't all that difficult. Easier than he expected, actually. Sharon the Karen managed to kill the most powerful Sith Lord in the galaxy, also a particularly easy feat.
When the Jedi confirmed that Sheev was in fact Darth Sideous, the senate had agreed to make Sharon the Chancellor. And since he was Chancellor, he could be with Padmé more often. Speaking of Padmé, he was soon going to be a father. Despite not always being able to be there for her, he tried to help her however he could, when he could. How nice it was of Skywalker to unknowingly help him by helping Padmé when he couldn't. He just knew his and Padmé's child would be the light of their lives.
That was one of many things Sharon was grateful for. Another one was being cleared of the crime that murdering the chancellor would be. Good thing they never found about any of the others. And if someone did... their final moments wound involve them screaming in pain, then dying as his lightsaber went through their chest. Extremely grateful that his lightsaber didn't leave much blood.
Speaking of lightsabers, every member of the Jedi Order was asking him to replace Yoda as Grand Master of the Jedi Order. As flattered as he was by the offers, he politely declined them. He'd rather be Supreme Chancellor of the Republic.
He looked up when he heard his door open, and he saw a clone. A particularly muscular clone wearing beach shorts and a Hawaiian shirt. He also wore sunglasses. Indoors. Sharon couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. Looked like his next mur- aggressive negotiations vict- opponent just walked straight to him.
"Wassup, dude," Said the clone, "Name's Chad. Brad the Chad."
Sharon kept his hand hovering over his lightsaber. "Karen. Sharon the Karen."
"That's totally awesome dude! We, like, have the same middle name." The clone—Brad the Chad—pushed up his shades, "probably because we're like twins, which is so totally rockin' dude.
"Anyways," Brad continued, "I was told I was replacing you or something and I was like 'that's so not cool, man,' but now I'm under the threat of death so let's all just chill and this can all go as smooth as your head."
Sharon was tired of Brad's long speech of replacement. "Or you can be as cool as a body."
"What?"
"What?" Sharon responded with no hesitation. Then he threw his lightsaber at Brad the same way he decapitated the Ex-Chancellor , but Brad quickly brought up his own sabe- it was a ring. Brad the Chad had some sort of lightsaber ring. Whatever. He'd go down as easily as the others.
"This is so not cool, man!" Brad shrieked.
Sharon continued to advance. Finally, a worthy adversary. "You will not be taking my place. I have earned it through all my hard work."
"You should just give up, man. I'd hate to see you dead."
Then Brad stabbed him.
The famous Sharon the Karen was dead.
There. There's your one-shot. happy?
Jk he's not dead, Sharon the Karen's pretty much a cockroach he's not dying that easily.
Sharon the Karen smirked at Brad's comment. "good thing I don't die easily."
Having had enough of playing around, Sharon flapped his wings once, sending Brad flying backwards. Brad's glasses shattered against the duracrete walls. And Brad began laughing. Evilly.
"Now you've done it. Now you'll have to deal with me and all the powers of the dark si-" Brad the Chad paused and looked down at the saber embedded in his stomach. Brad winced as Sharon called his lightsaber back to his hand. Brad's body fell to the ground softly.
"Yeah. Didn't think so." Sharon muttered to Brad's dead body. He clipped his lightsaber back to his side and took his defeated opponent into a fireman's carry and threw him off his balcony. He wouldn't have to worry about him again. Sharon hadn't even broken a sweat the entire time.
He reentered his main office, dusting himself off , when he heard his comm beep. He curiously looked to see who it was,and it was Padmé. He didn't hesitate picking up. "Hello,"
"Hello, my love," she said sweetly, "you're finally a father."
Sharon practically lit up. And he didn't want to waste any time to get to her. So he made good use of his new teleportation abilities and teleported there. And finally, he rested his eyes upon his children. His beautiful children.
He paused.
Children?
Padmé had twins. And he was absolutely overjoyed.
"What should we name them?" Padmé asked.
Sharon thought for a moment before deciding on the perfect names. "Cher for the girl, and Ron for the boy." That was they'd both be named after him.
"They're lovely names, my love." Padmé planted a soft kiss on his cheek, and Sharon spent the rest of the day with his girlfriend and children.
He promised himself he would protect them with his life. And if that buffoon named Skywalker were to say anything, he'd have to deal with...
The one...
The only...
Sharon the Karen.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
