A Golden Trap

Chapter 5: Lady of the Winter Night

Subaru: [Today was yet another hard day at work....!]

Subaru was finally finished with all of his work, including the extra paperwork that was brought in right before he was about to go back to his room. Some departments had experienced some delays, which meant that all the extra paperwork had to be taken care of by Subaru. To make matters worse, he was told that it all had to be done by today, which was absurd.

It was also exciting. This was his first time reaching the night of this day. How many times had it been. 2 years? 3 years? He had long lost count of how many times this day had repeated. But he was finally here.

Subaru: [Seriously, I feel as though I'm being taken way too lightly. I guess the Japanese's inability to say no is becoming a big liability here... I wonder if I could get away with being more assertive and saying no.]

However if the problem were to worsen because of it, even more people would get in trouble.

When he thinks about that, it's hard for him to gather up the courage and tell people "No", even after becoming the king and leaving his small-town mentality behind. Was it really alright for him to be the king with those sorts of thoughts?

Try as he might, he couldn't though. It seemed, somehow, that the more loops he completed, the more his old days seemed to consume of his memories. Maybe it was because he was respawning so much that consequences no longer felt real in this world. Maybe that is why the few consequences hit him like a wall of bricks.

Subaru: [It's too late to be spilling out my weaknesses, there isn't even anyone to listen to me vent anyway...]

Emilia: [You can let it out to me.]

While talking to himself, Subaru opened the door to his room and had planned to lay down and think of his plans for tomorrow. Instead, he was greeted by a girl sitting on the edge of his bed with her silver hair swaying in the night breeze. She smiled at Subaru, her silver hair shining in the moonlight.

Emilia: [Welcome back. Thank you for your hard work.]

Subaru was rendered speechless by her words of encouragement. His surprise came partly from the unexpectedness of her visit, and partly from the healing effects of her words. But the bigger factor is...

Subaru: [I......what is...this?]

Suddenly, an emotion welled up behind his eyes. Subaru felt something hot threaten to come out of his eyes and placed his sleeve on his face to try and stop it from leaking out.

If he looked at her face and suddenly started crying, Emilia would definitely feel bad. So he tried his best to hold it in, but in the end he wasn't able to stop the tears.

Subaru: [Dammit...what's with this?...Emilia-tan is here...]

Emilia: [Subaru.]

Subaru: [It's okay, I'm okay. It's not a problem. I'm totally fine. I'm fine.]

Emilia: [...]

Subaru turned his face away from Emilia and quickly tried to reassure her. He didn't want Emilia to see the disgusting face he was making. No, he didn't want anyone to see that face.

No one should have to see the weak look on Subaru's face.

Looking at where he had gotten by pushing aside their ideals, there was no way Subaru would allow himself to show them that.

But they didn't hate him for ignoring their dreams and standing where he stood now, on the contrary, they treated him with love and affection. He couldn't put into words how much that had helped him. For that matter, just how much had it saved him?