Today is Monday

Chapter 3: N

November 11, 1996

Today is Monday, and I still wonder, where did all the time go? This is my last year of school and I still feel trapped. I just don't know what I want anymore. What's going to happen to me after this? I only have a few minutes until my class ends, but I dread going to my parent's house more than going to school. I just needed a way to distra-

"Now what is the answer for number 4?" My teacher, Mrs. McMillion, asked, looking at the class. I didn't look up trying to make sure she didn't call on me, even though I already knew the answer. She looked around and when she faced me she said, "Mr. Dawson, what is the answer for number 4?" I put my pencil down.

"This is stupid." I whispered to myself. She knows I can answer this. Why me of all people? I looked at my other paper I had written next to my journal. It had all the answers as when she was explaining the rules, I had already got straight to work, that way I could write in my journal without a lecture on how I didn't do any class work. I looked at the board then at my paper.

"The answer is letter C." I replied, checking the paper I had.

"Very good Mr. Dawson. Now Jonathan," She continued to speak, but I mummified her out to continue writing.

I just needed a way to distract myself. My parents are finally going to be home today and they will be expecting a report on how I'm doing with getting into Harvard University. I know I'm going to get in, but I feel it's another chain going to go around me. But I don't know.

I looked at the clock hanging in our classroom. We had seven more minutes and the kids were already packing up.

"Okay class, we have numbers 14-20 as homework. I expect them at my desk when you come into class tomorrow." Mrs. McMillion told us as I heard zippers and things being moved around. Everybody was ready for the day to be over. Everybody except for me. When the bell rang everybody bolted out of the door. Except for me. I took a while to put my things into my backpack.

"Not in a hurry today?" Mrs. McMillion asked.

"Umm, no I- I'm just tired. That's all." I said, forcing a smile.

"I see, well see you tomorrow, Mr. Dawson and get some rest." She said as I walked out of the door.

"Yeah, okay I will." I answered back. As I walked in the halls of the school I felt someone put their hands over my shoulder.

"Hey N!" They said, releasing their wrapped arms around me. I sighed, knowing who it was.

"Hey Chris." It's been a while since we talked. What does he want from his 'family friend' this time?

"Look," He said going by my side, "Friday, my parents are going to go on a business trip and I'm throwing a party! I'm expecting to see you there!" He slapped my back and ran off. When he was running he turned to yell in this exaggerated voice he always does, "Oh! Bring your speakers!" 

"Okay..." I did another fake smile. I saw him go talk up another person probably trying to make them bring something too. I knew it. He only asked me to come because I have those new speakers.

When I left the school I rummaged through my bag to find my cd player. I put my headphones on and played the cd that was already in the player. I took the long way home. Which had me go through a public park. It had a curved road that went through the entire park and after the park was a hill, up the hill you reached my neighborhood. I kinda wandered around. I didn't stray from the path but my pace was slow as I walked through the park. When my legs got tired I sat in one of the benches. I was hesitant to write in my journal. My parents would be furious if they found me here writing instead of working on my studies. As I sat, music blaring into my ears, I looked around the park. It looked bland, yes there were people here and there, but nothing seemed eye catching to me. Should I do my homework here? That way if my parents show up I have an excuse to be here? I looked around trying to find a table anywhere. I saw one that was nearby so I grabbed my backpack and walked over to it. The sun was still up and the table had no shade near it. Oh well, it's better than being at home. I got to work first doing my AP Calculus homework. I got my scientific calculator out and started to work. After that was my AP English which required an essay report of a book we've been reading. With a sore hand from writing I continued with my physics assignment. I did other classes as well, but those were the major ones. By the time I had finished everything the sun was setting. I got my bag to put all my stuff in it, that's when I noticed how hot my bag was. The sun must have been strong today... I was sweating, but I didn't notice. Not until I finished everything and was getting up from the table. When I went on the path the shade of a tree fell over me and I felt refreshed as it had probably been hours since I got out of the sun. It's strange to have a hot day in November, it's usually cloudy. I continued down the path of the park and I saw the exit. That's when I felt dread. I was so close to my parent's house. I knew they were at the house, they said they would be. It had been three months since I last saw them, but everyday they would call to lecture me, saying to behave and to keep ties with my 'friends.' Today however, I left my flip phone at home. I somewhat smirked, at least they can't be calling me right now.

When I got out of the park, the sun was now barely visible. I walked up the hill and one of my favorite songs played. It was the last one in the cd, Ha! The irony that I'm just getting home and now my player is finishing up. When I got to the top of the hill and saw my parent's house I frowned, but I noticed that my parent's car was not there. Maybe they're not home yet. Man, I hope they aren't looking for me right now... I got my keys to open the gate and walked towards the door. I didn't even have to knock as my caregiver opened the door.

"Good evening Mr. Dawson, I hope you had a wonderful day. Did you go somewhere after school?" My caregiver, Ms. Eve, asked.

"Uhhh yeah, I went with some friends. Did my homework with them." I looked at our first guest living room to see if my parents were there. Luckily they weren't.

"I see, sadly your parents are not here yet." That's wonderful! I thought, but kept a straight face. "They said they had met an old professor of theirs and had offered to take them out for dinner. They will arrive later on tonight, around ten." She finished.

"Okay, I think I will be in bed by the time they come." I answered but then I added, trying to sound sentimental, "Sadly."

"Nothing to be sorry about your education takes priority. Speaking of education, I know you said you did your homework with your friends, but did you finish all of it?"

"Yes Ms. Eve, I did." I answered politely, although I knew she was only asking that way she doesn't get scolded by my parents. "I will be going to my room now."

"Your dinner is on your study desk." She told me as I went up our staircase.

"Thank you." I replied almost all the way up the stairs. Thank goodness they are not home! Now I can write without them noticing! I opened the door to my room. I guess Ms. Eve cleaned it. Maybe because she thought my parents were coming and they wanted me presentable or whatever. I usually always had clothes on the floor, but all of it was gone and the trash I had on my desk was cleaned out. Food on the left side of my desk. She reorganized the entire desk leaving me confused on where I had left my pen. It was in the third drawer when it's supposed to be in the first. Ugh, I hate it when she cleans my room. Leaves me on a wild goose chase. I went to my backpack, which I threw on my bed, to get my journal. This was my third one, however I never got to keep the others. My parents always threw them away, disappointed in me for putting writing first before math or science. They said it's not a hobby a Dawson should or will have, but I feel like I need to do this. My parents can't control my thoughts. This is my freedom. I got my journal, put my food aside because I can always eat later and sat at my desk. With my pen I wrote over the pencil I had done in school to make it more permanent. Then I continued where I left off.

November 11, 1996

Today is Monday, and I still wonder, where did all the time go? This is my last year of school and I still feel trapped. I just don't know what I want anymore. What's going to happen to me after this? I only have a few minutes until my class ends, but I dread going to my parent's house more than going to school. I just needed a way to distract myself. My parents are finally going to be home today and they will be expecting a report on how I'm doing with getting into Harvard University. I know I'm going to get in, but I feel it's another chain going to go around me. But I don't know.

It's been a while and my parents won't be coming not until late. Giving me time to write here. You know all the time I kinda wish I could have different parents, even if they were to be for a day or if they were to die after I bonded with them. My housekeeper is only here for the money and my so-called friends are really after my money too. What I give to be given to somebody that actually cares for me and not what I can give to benefit them. I want to know what it means when someone says 'I love you.' Even if I would lose them, I just want to know and understand what it means to be cared for. Is that too much to ask?