Chapter One ╱ The Calm Before The Storm
[ Pre-Panic ! ]
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━They say to play the game one has to know what it's like to give up all fear. To feel no panic. It's the only rule and the only way to win. And winning is what you wanted. If you lose, you stay where losing is all you will know. If you win, you're free.
Free is all Cassandra Drew has wanted to be since she outgrew her favorite pair of Converse and realized that might not be the only thing she's outgrown. Somewhere along the way, she had outgrown her small town and the corners of it she used to spend time memorizing. Had outgrown the traces of it that held her mother and father, even years after their disappearance.
For a few years, she did everything she could to convince herself that she didn't have to be like the others. She saved half of every check she made at the post office. Aced every exam that was set in front of her. Made sure to never get in trouble with the law. Convinced herself she wouldn't need to play Panic when the time came.
And she knew she wasn't special. Knew these were all things that every kid in Carp did to convince themselves they'd be okay. But she thought she'd be different.
She should've guessed this was a common thought too.
Looking around the dozens of faces she's gone to school with since they were in diapers, she can see it in a way she hasn't before. Or maybe it's the zeros staring back at her from her once full savings account that's making her see the worst in people. The jury still seems to be out on that one.
Really, part of her has always known that nothing sets her apart from the others in this room, but she's always done a pretty good job at pretending. Pretending she's not just as selfish as Ray Hall. As scared as Bishop Moore. As cynical as Heather Nill. As secretive as Natalie Williams. As sarcastic as Alexander O'Hion. As passive as Daniel Diggins. And as she scans their faces one by one, she secretly admits to what a lie all that pretending was.
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Deadbeat, Dodge Mason.
FanfictionThere has to be a way. To care for wounds, without reopening them. Panic ╱ Season One. Dodge Mason © Mads ╱ 2024.