Konosuba: A Real Adventure for this Loner!

Chapter 2 - Life in a Real Fantasy World!

— Part 1 —
Back Pain for this High-Schooler!

As the bright sun rose to dawn a new day in this strange fantasy world, I sat up from the blanket me and Aqua had laid on the floor to sleep on, stretching out to alleviate the ache in my back.

Obviously, as we had no substantial source of income, and because a certain blue-haired someone spent all the money we earned on alcohol each night, we couldn't afford to stay anywhere other than the run-down stables. With how many broke adventurers also stayed in this town, we were actually incredibly lucky to get our own stall.

That doesn't mean I have to like sleeping in a stable though.

I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and looked up to see Megumin standing at the entrance to our stall, her arms crossed and a stern expression on her face.

"Mind explaining what you're doing, Kazuma?"

"Uhhh... waking up...?" I answered, scratching my head. "Where'd you even come from?" She sighed indignantly, posing for dramatic effect.

"As a masterful and experienced Archmage who travels often and could die at any time, I need not enjoy luxuries such as sleeping in a proper room!"

"Translation: You're even more broke than we are." I surmised.

"Ghhh—that's beside the point!" She pointed at me, flustered. "Why are you next to Aqua while she's sleeping?! Someone like you will surely—"

"Never." I interrupted, face serious.

"But—"

"Never." I repeated. "This is Aqua we're talking about."

"Why should I take your word for it? Of course you'd deny it." Megumin frowned, but she seemed to waver a little bit.

"Then let me tell you a story from when we first came to this town." I sighed. "When we first started living in these stables and doing construction jobs, I tried everything I could think of to find her attractive. I smelled her, spent time with her, and even stared at her as she came out of the bath wearing nothing but a towel." Megumin raised an eyebrow at me, but I continued.

"I'm a man who's not too picky when it comes to girls. Big, small, curvy, flat, timid, strong... there wasn't a person from where I came from who I would have turned down to if they wanted to date me. And you know what? I couldn't do it." I shrugged. "I did try my hardest though."

"I don't even know what to say after hearing all that... You're amazing in your own right..."

"Personally, I think this is actually a positive development. I mean, ever since coming here I haven't been even remotely attracted to any of the girls I've met! Maybe my days of being an awkward pervert are coming to a close."

"I wouldn't bet on it..." Megumin sighed.

"I was being sarcastic. It's probably because all the girls I've met so far have been problematic weirdos."

"Hey, wait! I'm a girl you've met! What's wrong with me?!"

"Huhh? 'What's wrong with me?' Do you think a normal guy would go for a loli explosion maniac who's still in her chunibyo phase? Get real!"

"L—Loli?!" Megumin yelled, flustered. "We're practically the same age! And do you seriously see yourself as 'a normal guy?!' "

"I'm the only normal one in the party! And I wouldn't date any of you!"

"Huh? What about me, Kazuma?" Me and Megumin stared at Darkness, who had just arrived.

"Who would want to date a perverted Masochist?"x2
As Darkness was looking conflicted over whether to refute our accusation or be turned on by it, Aqua cried out beside me, apparently awakened by the argument.