D E G R A D E | m . Verѕтappen

4| When the sun is eclipsed

M. Verstappen

I woke up with the most horrible headache. This was not the way I wanted this to go. I knew I was drunk and making an ass of myself but now I wake up in a hotel room that was not my own. I hope I didn't do anything stupid with a stranger, I was supposed to be with Lando anyways. Before I could even begin to try and familiarise myself with the surroundings, a small figure came up to me and peered at me with a quizzical look on her face.

"Your eyes are a little too far apart," she said and a familiar voice scolded her, "Astraea, stop, that's rude."

I blinked a couple of times and I stifled down a smile when I saw Sabrina. I ended up in Sabrina's room with what seems to be her...little sister. Oh god, now I really hope I didn't make an ass of myself. God, it was still so hard not to look at her. All these years I told myself I should hate her for leaving me but god, the feelings never went away. How could they when the years haven't aged her one bit. She's so beautiful and the way she smiles, it's still the same. I was pulled out of my thoughts when Astraea said, "Bri! I'm allowed to judge him! Don't tell me you like him or somethin?!"

"Astraea, I never taught you to be rude," Sabrina warned biut despite her defending me, she pulled me up from the floor as if I weighed nothing and said, "Go on, I'm used to having bad mornings and I can handle myself so I ran to a nearby bakery as discreetly as possible and got us something to eat." I raised my brow and said, "How did you manage to get bruschetta at this time and in Sakhir." Sabrina rolled her eyes and said, "Don't ask too many questions and eat."

"See Bri, this man is stupid! He sees food when he's clearly hungry but decides to ask questions first! I had every right to tell him that his eyes were too far apart-" the little blonde piped up and I nearly laughed seeing how similar she was with Sabrina. The sassiness though, I don't think she had in similarity with her sister. "Astraea! Eat your breakfast now and stop being rude!" Sabrina warned and the little girl groaned as she took bites off her bruschetta.

"She looks a lot like you but I don't know where she's got that attitude from, must've been a lot trying to raise your sister since..." I trailed off, realising that I wasn't even there for her mother's funeral. Sabrina stiffened at my words but said nothing and decided to just eat. I felt awful but I couldn't go, not after all that happened, it would just tear all my wounds anew. But Sabrina's mother had always been kind to me, both of them were...I could never forget the family I had in them.

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February 16, 2014: Detroit, Michigan

I didn't know what I was doing. I remember fighting with my father because he scolded me for expressing I was tired. I'd been practicing all day the night before and needed a rest but he yelled at me to get back in the car and continue practicing. He said it was important that I practiced so I'd win the F3 European Championship and that there was no time for slacking. But my bones ached and i could barely see anything with the sweat forming on my brows and dripping onto my lashes.

I remember the weight of his expectations crushing me, each word he uttered a blow to my already weary spirit. As I stood there, trembling from exhaustion, his voice echoed in my ears like thunder, drowning out the beat of my tired heart. The sweat stung my eyes, blurring the world around me into a hazy, suffocating blur. But beneath the physical strain, it was the ache in my soul that cut the deepest. How could he not see the agony etched on my face, the desperation in my every gasping breath? All I wanted was a moment's respite, a chance to catch my breath amidst the relentless storm of his demands. Yet, in his eyes, there was only the unyielding glare of disappointment, a silent reproach for my perceived weakness.

That's when I snapped and said something back. I told him I was tired and that I should have just stayed with mom.

He threw a wrench at my face.