The Boy Next Door

12

My head is spinning as I wake up on a soft bed that has the most comfy and also the heaviest and warmest blanket.
The moment my eyes are open, I see my heels.
I was drunk last night and I passed out.
The moment I felt my naked body on the sheets OH SHIT! DID I HAVE SEX WITH JULIAN?!
My eyes shot wide open to that thought and behind me was no one. No Julian.
It was just me alone. That's what I had thought until a tall figure's shadow was on the floor. Looking out at the balcony was Julian, shirtless with black shots and holding his mug of something. The moment he turned behind I slammed myself to the bed. He caught me before I acted myself into sleeping, "Hey drunk head get up! It's seven am." He sung. How is he in such a good mood after being drunk the whole night?
Julian looks at my sleepy face and hands me his cup "Have this green tea, it'll give you some energy to wake yourself from the hangover." Julian lets the mug lie on the table and grabs both of my cold hands. "C'mon get up." I let out a silly moan but it fails. "If you don't get up, I'm going to kiss you." I look at a very smiley Julian and wake myself up.
"You don't want me to kiss you?" He asked
"Not when I've not brushed." I walk to the bathroom. Julian lets out a big laugh.
By the time my hair is tied up and I'm dressed, Julian makes the bed and prepares me a cup of green tea. We both sit together on the floor of the balcony admiring the blue sunny sky.
"Yesterday was amazing." I say, looking at Julian whose eyes are shut, embracing the silence between us.
"You know, if you see the clouds in the sky it looks like two birds are chasing each other's while the mother is running behind-" I was even done with the whole sentence and his lips were pressed on mine. It took me off guard at first but I realized how much I wanted to kiss him, how much I was attracted to him.
Was it practice or was it real? I had no idea what his kiss meant. He wanted a fake relationship, is it a sign that he wants to make it real when we've barely faked ourselves?
The knock on the door by Jane startles the two of us as she calls us down for breakfast.
We walk down, holding hands and wish everyone while they collect their breakfast. Jane appears in her brown and yellow pyjamas saying, "Hey, we are going shopping today, would you like to come with us after Breakfast?" We both nod since we didn't have anything on our schedules.
"I meant Amelia, Julian. Only girls!"

Julian sighs, "Fine, go enjoy."

I look at Julian, still wondering if it was a kiss Kiss or just a you know when to do it Kiss.

To push off the lingering thought in my mind, I plant a soft kiss on his cheek and wink at him before walking away with Jane.

I, Jane and her bridesmaids had roamed what felt like every clothing store in the whole of Seattle. Jane without even thinking had purchased at least one part of clothing from each store. We were now in a shop named Allen Solly pretty much known for its exquisite collection in men's shirts. Everyone was busy exploring and I went to a different aisle of the store, away from them. There was a massive clothes rail that hung a variety of formal shirts.

From examining one shirt to another, there was one shirt that caught my eyes. I stared at it for what felt like one whole minute. A pitch black silk shirt that could match with any pair of formal pants and it made me imagine how Julian's biceps could flex in this.

"Oh my gosh! Amelia! This is such a good piece for Julian. He usually has less of black but I'm sure he's going to love it." Jane exclaims.

"Don't tell Julian I'm buying it. His birthday is in two days so I want to gift him something he'll like."

"Forget about liking, I'm pretty sure he'll love it." The two of us smile and then walk to the cash register.

It is evening by the time we buy everything and reach back to the hotel. Exhausted, I knock on the door and it is opened by Julian. I hide the bag in the closet and out of nowhere I just embrace him like an urge that lightens a flame in me. Julian doesn't say anything, the two of us don't move until one of us lets go. "Julian, I don't know how to do this?" I sigh.

"What?"

"This fake dating thing. Is it possible that one can have feelings for someone while fake dating."

"You like someone else?"

"I like you, Julian" I say. The words slip out of my mouth and the heavy feeling in my chest is released.

"We can't be together, Amelia." He walks off.

"What's wrong in that? Can't we give each other a chance?" I argue. He ignores me.

"We can't be together." he repeated.  "We both are two different people. We don't understand each other. We have a deal that is to act that we are together until the wedding is over. Like you, even my parents are begging me to get a plus one and in that case I found you. They said if I bought someone with me, my father will let me join his company as his assistant or a co-leader. Since I am already a part of Vincente Enterprises, I hope for an upgrade."

"So you're using me? To get your promotion? And what do I get in return? Staying at your place seriously? See where that is and see where is your promotion, Julian?" I'm staring at Julian with a sense of rage and overflowing emotions. He doesn't answer because he doesn't have any answers in him to reply back to me.

I wear my shoes and storm of the room, and out of the hotel. I need a break, I don't even want to look at him right now.

I've been used by everyone all my life and I am seriously done. Once I put all of my trust in someone, they always end up using me to accomplish something for themselves and what do I get in return? The bare minimum. Although I appreciate it's general human tendency that no human being can tolerate being used. It's a waste of time and energy.