HER FIRST AND FOREVER | 18+

CHAPTER 3

QIRAT'S POV:

As I came into my room I directly landed onto my bed because I was so tired. And I am too disturbed because of my encounter with Ahmer today. Its not like I hate him or something its just that sometimes people do something that makes them lose their place in your heart. You can't hate them but you can't love them either. It's something in between.

He was the a person who was too close to me other than Khizra ofcourse. From playing in garden to school to tuitions to now college he always sticks with me and ultimately our bond became so strong. I have always considered him as my closest friend. But things have changed now. He is not same Ahmer to me as he was before.

As I was thinking all of this in my head, a loud screamed of my Amma reached to my ears and makes me come back to the world, chain of my thoughts broken with the trance of my Amma's voice and I focused on what she was saying. Like always she was asking me to eat something as I came back from my college. And like always I only demand for a cup of tea with some crunchy snacks,that's it.

Ahmer is, actually was, my best friend, he always supported me for everything. From schools to tution classes to college now, we are always together and there for each other in every ups and downs. His family knows about me and vice versa. Not even us but our family is also very close. I am not upset with him but I am hurt like legit hurt because of him.

It was the time before the summer break last year and at that time he completely ghosted me for a whole year. No messages replies, no calls and nothing. I even don't know the reason of it. Like why he does that? I was always with him from listening to his breakup stories and gave support to him to discussing and gaving solutions to all his family issues. Be it major or minor one.

But he just don't talk to me when I needed him the most. Last year when I lost my grandmother that period of my life was very tough. Everyone in the family is coping up with this and I just don't want to discuss my emotions with them as they are already very hurt and sad and that point of time I just want someone to discuss my emotions with, a friend I need, he just message me to pay his condolences and that's just it. He never asked me how I feel or anything. This just hurts me beyond words. Because I was with him as a friend whenever he needs me and he was not there with me when I want a friend's shoulder to cry.

It's not like I don't have other friends but it just that I am a very private person I just don't discuss my personal matter with everyone, no matter how small and big it is. And he is the only friend I have whom I am this close. Other that Khizra, of course.

So, that's how that one year create a huge blank and gap in our friendship. It's not like that I always overburden him with my problems but the thing which hurt me that he stopped talking suddenly and don't even care to explain his problem or the reason of not to talk. I was genuinely concerned about what's going in his mind and tried multiple times to ask him but he behaves like a total stranger with me and then I stopped asking, thinking that may be I am interfering too much in his personal space or that may be he just don't want to discuss about it, so I feel like it's just better to not to ask.

After the starting of 4 semester, he just came to me  and start talking to me like nothing happened. That was just so shocking to see like how can you talk normally to the other person after ghosting them for a year? When I asked him that what is this behaviour? Why were you not talking to me? And why you start talking to me suddenly? He said that it was his family issue due to which he ghost me, in short he wants some “me” time. And that's the reason he stopped talking to everyone. To be honest I was okay with the reason he gave me but I don't know why I am not being able to talk to him like before. May be I overthink everything. May be he changed or may be I changed. It is also possible that may be we both changed because the zero connection in the spam of that one year changes our bond completely. Thinking about this is too much stressing and it hurting my head now.