Special: Abir's Letter

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Dear troublemaker,

I wish I had stumbled upon your letter way sooner. I could have achieved everything you wanted from me, though I have lived a similar life, I'm not going to lie. If anything's missing in it, it's you. I wanted to lead this life with you. But I guess, we wanted different things in the end.

I will forever be thankful to Preethi, for changing your mind. Or maybe it was me? Or those damn Paris crepes? Fine. Whatever it was that made you believe you could live, I'm happy that you made a decision to extend your precious life. And I know why you chose to live apart, finally.

Sadly, it was because I was going to die. It took me a disease to understand you and I apologise.

It's hard. It's hard to watch just life pass by, like a stranger when you've lost everything. I don't know how I used to live before. Honestly, I don't even want to explore it anymore. I get the tiredness and depression. And the desire to end it all.

Amidst all of this, if you find a ray of hope, you're afraid that you'll turn that too, into an ugly darkness. Therefore, you decide to let go. You give up because it's easier than standing up for what you want, which is practically impossible in your case. Yay! The cripple jokes are back!

And so you run away than facing that dark emptiness, which is what happened in my case, a total failure.

I blamed you all these days for not fighting for us, but now I get it, Mishti. And to accept it bravely like you did, instead of hiding away, I admire you so much for that. Though you were literally burning in the fire, you chose to save me. But hey, guess I love getting roasted.

I was content. I was happy. And I am satisfied with the time I had on this Earth.

The only regret is not being able to tell you how much I miss you. How much I wish you'd change your mind. How much I hate hoping despite knowing you'd be hurt. How much I love that laugh of yours. How much I adore that dimple you get. And how much I'm mesmerised when you immerse yourself in the piano. You're a natural talent. Use it!

I want you to live here, for a bit more time. Because I'm not ready to tolerate your nagging again. Explore food, art, music, every other thing that interests you.

Live my share of life.

And then when Vega and Altair meet, let's catch up on a cup of tea.

With much love,

Your saviour.

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