Rekindling the Lost Affection- Haerin/Wonyoung x Reader

Chapter 1- Breakup

A/n: If you are a past reader, I might be making important changes to each chapter in order to create a plot that has more depth to it. Right now most chapters of the fanfic are unavailable as I make changes to them.

If you are a past reader, in order to check changes for each chapters, please check the "updates/changes to chapters" chapter.

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Your POV

"Let's break up..."

After I hearing these words, time seemed to stop as I faced my long time girlfriend in the park we frequented.

The first thing that hit me was pain. It hurt listening to Haerin, the girlfriend I've been dating for a while, officially confirm that our relationship is over.

But it was probably inevitable. The signs had been there for a while; I was just ignoring them and hoping they weren't true. A while ago, when Haerin told me that she had been selected to debut in the new girl group NewJeans, it was obvious we would face challenges if we continued to date after her debut. 

However, I didn't think it get to be this bad. Ever since she told me the news, we hadn't seen or talked to each other for more than five minutes. Over time, our feelings dwindled until they became weaker than a candle in the wind, and it seemed that today, that flame would finally be extinguished.

Underneath the pain I was feeling, there was something else- a twinge of anger hiding underneath a blanket of sadness and regret. Towards the end of the relationship, it was mostly her fault that we hadn't been able to communicate openly with each other, which could have prevented this from happening. Every time I tried to talk to her about the state of our relationship, she dodged the question and told me she had to go because of dance or vocal training.

As my mind jolted back to the present, I scanned Haerin's face for any traces of uncertainty. "Maybe we can still talk it out," I thought desperately in my head. She hadn't given me a chance to talk about our relationship in the past, so maybe this could be an opportunity to turn things around. 

Briefly, I thought I saw a tinge of regret in her cat-like eyes, and I was about to ask her if ending things was what she really wanted. 

But then, it was gone the next second, instantly replaced with a harsh expression filled with resolve, leaving me to wonder whether what I had seen earlier was genuine or if it was just my imagination. 

Staring into her eyes for a few more seconds, I continued to grasp for any hints as to what she might be thinking, but to no avail. She had put up an iron wall between us, and after seeing her resolve, I assumed she would remain committed to her decision. She left no room for negotiation.

As regrettable as it was, I guess there's nothing that could be done now. All I could do is to accept her decision...     

Despite being angry and disappointed over the outcome of our relationship, I didn't want to end things with Haerin on a sour note. Even if she had been unreachable and distant in the last few months, throughout our relationship, we had been through a lot of happier times together. Even though it was now ending, both of us deserved a respectable conclusion to our feelings.

"I understand," I managed to say weakly, my throat suddenly feeling dry. I wanted to give her a better answer. There were so many things I wanted to tell her, countless things I wanted to ask her, but I didn't have the courage to take that extra step.

As my final attempt for reconciliation, I mustered up my courage and asked hopefully, "Would it at least be okay if we remained friends?" I felt confident that she would say yes, since we had been very close friends before our relationship started.

Haerin turned her face away before replying, "I'm sorry but no, having a male friend would make things harder for me as an idol. I can't take that risk."

Tears started falling from my eyes as I realized this hurt more than her wanting to break up with me. I could understand if she wanted to end our romantic relationship, but we had been friends for years. It felt like in less than a few minutes, I had lost all my years of friendship with Haerin.

Through the tears I asked her, "Haerin, we've been friends for years. I don't know if I pissed you off or something, but surely we can work something out to remain friends, right?"

"Y/n, loo-," Haerin started.

"Please, I've known you since forever ago," I pleaded with her as my emotions threatened to overwhelm me. "Before all of this-," I took a second to breathe, "We were best friends... at the very least, I don't want to lose that. Please, Haerin."

"I'm sorry Y/n, but we can't remain friends. I'm cutting off all ties between us. I hope you understand," Haerin shut me down coldly.

I was astounded. Questions flooded my mind, as I wondered what truly happened between us  and how Haerin had grown to become so cold.

Haerin began to walk away from me, but I knew that there was something I had to know, in case we never talked again. I asked her softly, choking on my words, "Wait, Kang Haerin, please... did you ever love me.... and why... what happened towards the end?

She stopped and turned towards me for the last time. Her expression softened as she said, "Yes, there was a time I loved you, but I... I can't anymore, and I don't feel comfortable being friends with you either."

She then paused for a moment. In a voice that seemed ready to break, she spoke as she turned her back on me, "Y/n, I truly hope that you'll be able to find happiness without me. I mean it. I'm really sorry."

I tried to glance at her expression, but because she was walking away, I couldn't see her face. After that, no more words were exchanged between the two of us. Watching her get into the company car, I tried to get a glimpse of her one more time before she left me forever.

As she got in, I could have sworn I saw puffiness and tears around her eyes, but she was too far away now. Before I could even act, the car door closed, as her manager drove her far away to a place I could not reach.

Realizing we may never meet again, with both of us walking on completely different paths in life, I felt empty as the feelings of regret, sadness, and despair that I had been trying to suppress washed over me. 

I consoled myself. Maybe this was best for both of us. I could guess her reasons for the breakup. It's easy to lose interest in someone you only see once every few months, and being an idol is difficult enough on its own without having to worry about dating someone outside the industry. Maybe she was being considerate of me in her own way...maybe she felt that she couldn't be the girlfriend I needed.

But what haunted me the most was how she rejected my offer of staying friends. Her explanation didn't make sense. Surely there are lots of other idols who have male friends outside the industry, right? "Maybe she really just doesn't want to have anything to do with me anymore," I thought to myself.

I spent some time taking in my surroundings with my hazy mind, looking for distractions for the pain I was feeling. I had nearly forgotten that we were meeting at a park. Jealousy seeped into my heart as I observed the carefree and happy people around me- children, families, and couples. I wondered why in this moment, I couldn't be like them.

Eventually having enough, I got up, ready to leave the park and my relationship with Haerin behind. I stumbled towards the nearest cafe, my emotions a mess and my heart in turmoil.

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A/N: Hope this was an enjoyable read.