Life as a Hemmings (luke Hemmings fanfic)

16

-Sevannah's Pov-
As I was sitting in the back seat I decided to text Bailey.
Me: Do you ever get so disgusted with yourself, like you can not believe how stupid and thoughtless you are and it's so frustrating because you keep telling yourself that you'll do better next time but then next time rolls around and the same thing keeps happening and you end up in this pattern of mediocrity.
Bailey: what's this about babe what's wrong? Are you home if not I'll go over once you get home ok
Me: No I'm not home , it's a long story.
Once the text sent I locked my phone and decided to stare out the window until Tyler started talking to me "so you're going to sit in the back seat and get butt hurt about what happened Sev get over it I should be pissed at you for basically fucking Michael !! But you don't see me giving you shit plus you should have left me a long time ago because you knew this was going to happen so this ones on you so don't sit there and cry" and that's what I did I sat in the back and cried because he's never been like that with me I was going to go off on him but I didn't want to make the situation worse so I just stood quiet. The car came to a complete stop so I got out the car while Tyler is telling me to get back in the car I didn't really care anymore I was about like 2 blocks away from my house and at the moment I just rather walk , I just wanna clear my head why does it hurt so much to love someone maybe he's right I should have left him a long time ago it would have saved me all this stress and anxiety he gives me . Next thing you know I'm home with Tyler at the front waiting from me he starts to walk towards me and grabs my hand but I pull it away so he grabs my hips but this time I didn't fight back he kissed the top of my head and said "What I said in the car I didn't mean it I was just really mad at you and the whole Michael thing now I understand the bullshit I put you through and it hurts like hell and I'm so sorry I know sorry doesn't do anything but I want us to try to work things out please Sev we both fucked up but I fucked up more and I can't lose someone like you . You're my world we been together since elementary well besides Bailey it's always been us three together but anyways that's the whole reason I asked you out because I couldn't stand to see you with anyone else no one would have understood you better then me just please Sevannah." he looked at me with so much pain in his eyes he was crying so I hugged and wiped his eyes so the tears were gone and said "Tyler you know I love you so much and yeah we been through so much together and to be honest I'm not ready to just throw that away we been in each other's lives since 4th grade and I don't know what it's like to be with out you and I'm not ready to find out but you hurt me so much Ty and at this point I'm over thinking stuff I think it's best if you just leave." I looked at him and his face is the same face when he found out his great grandma past away so I can already tell he won't take this very well. He let go of me and got in his car and left he didn't say bye or anything just left , left me with my thoughts I know things will never be the same between us.
I walked in the house and went up stairs to my room I took off my shoes and plugged in my phone and just laid in bed I know Bailey told me to text her when I got home but I rather not I need alone time so I sat on my bed and pulled out my note book so I can write songs down. It took me at least five minutes to come up with 'Caught you at midnight
Not in my right mind
What you're afraid of
Is where I just came from' with that I somewhat feel in love with it so I continued writing more 'An ugly confession
I think that I'm broken
When I try to be open
I get the feeling that I'm giving up on something I love, too much The sweetest misery that's taking me, I'm lost in the Rush' I loved it that's all I could think of I started to get tired so I decided to take a nap and see if I can finish it when I wake up.
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I woke up to my phone ringing to find out that it was Michael calling me I debated on answering it but I didn't I can't see him it even talking to him knowing he slightly ruined my relationship like what if the only reason Sam was with Tyler today was because he knew about me and Michael I got all these thoughts going through my head so I decided to get dress and run. It took me at least 5 mins to get dressed but I was out the door and ready to run , while I was running I bumped into some random guy "omg I'm sorry I didn't mean to bump into you I was just in my zone" I said "hey don't worry about I get it I'm the same way sometimes, it's like you block everything out and focus on the music and where you're going huh?" He looked at me and smiled "yeah I usually do that when I have a lot on my mind other then that I pay attention but like I said I'm sorry again" with out me realizing it we started walking together "and like I said don't worry about it ok , why don't we go get something to eat and you tell me what's on your mind they say if you tell a stranger what happened you feel better . If you want my cars down the street we can go it's up to you though" I smiled at him and started walking and yelled "ok I'm down let's go just don't kill me or anything ok! "