The Cost of Conjuring: A Bargain Beyond Blood

18. I'm a coward

The moment I ease out of the darkness and into this pastel rainbow explosion, I wish I hadn't. As the memories of last night come tumbling in, I'm hit with the realization that, by being an absolute idiot, I may have sealed the path to my own execution. It clings to me like the sour taste of old vomit and blood clings to my tongue.

Every muscle in my body is stiff and sore as I try moving them but, at least the burning pain is gone. And from the soft nest of pillows, plushies, and the cozy red blanket, I feel confident I will be able to walk on my own today. A great improvement.

"Finally! I was just about to wake you."

Alice is in her chair, as big, green, and trollish as last night, still wearing her unicorn onesie. I have no idea if she's been there the whole time or if she slept somewhere else.

On the main screen in front of her, a pixelated cat is hugging an enormous carrot sending hearts everywhere before the scene cuts back to what I assume is the same cat farming a carrot patch.

I push the quilt down and manage to sit up on the first try. "How long was I out?"

"Twenty hours. And you were so still I had to check you were breathing like every other hour." She says it like a joke but her voice is too tense.

"Sorry. It's normal."

Alice gives me a look, closes the game, and picks up a newscast with a weather report.

"You said this storm was your doing? No wonder you were out cold, it's breaking all the records."

"It's still going?" I lean forward, trying to catch the weather map.

Taking Li along really amped up the backlash. I hope Cera's okay. Last time I teleported the storm only lasted a couple of hours.

"It's made the national news."

That is very bad. I bite my lip and add that to my growing list of problems. I don't like the way Alice is watching me. Her face is too serious.

"This is bad, Levi."

"I know that." My fingers find the plush dragon which I apparently slept hugging like a child but fiddling with its glassy eyes or soft wings isn't enough.

Alice swirls on her chair and it squeaks in protest..

"I've scanned the forums and it looks like the QMs have put a reward out for anyone who can give them information about you."

"Shit." I replace the dragon with the coin that miraculously survived last night and is still in my pocket. "The dark elves haven't turned up?" Like I would have that kind of luck.

The thought drags a bucketload of guilt in its wake. I'm not the unlucky one in this situation. I did not like or even know Elf A, but the idea I somehow banished or killed her isn't softened by that.

"No, sorry. And I have no idea how they disappeared either. Or the dwarves," she says and turns back to her computer bringing up another window. "The closest thing I could find in the records are a couple of goblins disappearing after trying some kind of alchemy spell. But after a month it turned out they were just shrunk down to the size of ants. You want breakfast? I have Lucky Charms and Honey Monster puffs."

I have to stay absolutely still and breathe carefully through my nose for ten seconds to avoid throwing up all over the plushies and pillows. Eating is out. Water would be good though.

"No, thanks," I say and reach for the enormous glass of water I put on the floor before passing out.

I have no idea if the effects of coming down from Phoria have passed. I still feel like shit but that could be just my life.

Alice watches me drink with a thoughtful expression before she asks, "What are you going to do now?"

The million-dollar question.

"I... I don't know. I need to get to Cera somehow. She's been alone for days. Do you know what they have on me?" Other than the eyewitnesses I have them last night.

Alice bites her green lip. "I would need the active records for that. Sorry, the QMs archives are easy to access but the police servers..."

"Oh, that makes sense," I say and try not to sigh and curse myself for the hundredth time for pissing Li off. He could access those records in a heartbeat. With my luck, he will plant shit in them making me look even more guilty.

"How would you even get there? I mean, they will be waiting for you, right?" She bites her green lower lip in a way I'm sure no troll ever has.

"Yeah, but I can do a concealment charm at Cera's," I say and put down the glass of water trying to prepare myself to get up and leave.

It's harder than I thought. Apart from the assault on my eyes, the nest of pillows, plushies, and quilts I'm sitting in is really warm and cozy. It reminds me of being cuddled by Cera. Just softer and less scaly. And with the pink glittery shirt I fit right in, making it easier to pretend the idiot who always fucks up and will probably get caught and imprisoned for life is someone else.

"You sure you should do more magic right now?" Alice looks concerned and I guess I can't blame her after seeing how messed up I was.

"The spell is super easy and with the amplifier and enough time to do a proper circle with all the protection layers I should be fine."

I push the quilt off me and manage to get to my feet and stay there.

"It's so cool you know a dragon," she says and I'm too focused on preparing myself for facing my life outside this safe cocoon of pink glitter to hear the question underneath. But she's Alice so she doesn't let that stop her. "What was the backlash? Who did it take?"

I freeze like someone replaced my blood with liquid nitrogen. Of course she'd put it together, and our pact of not asking is dead and gone since she told me all about what happened to her.

But nothing happened to me. I made it happen. I'm not a victim like her. I'm the villain. A stupid unintentional villain, but still. I can't tell her. She will hate me. And I can't take that right now. I just can't.

I guess at least some of my thoughts show on my face because she backs off, saying, "Sorry, I just thought since I told you..."

I can't answer because I'm still frozen. Like staying absolutely still will somehow undo everything or make me invisible.

Alice seems to get the picture because she picks up an older model of a phone from her desk and holds it out to me like a piece offering. "Here, it has my number."

I unfreeze and accept it.

"Do you have a toothbrush I can borrow?" I ask, avoiding looking her in the eyes.

I really need to brush my teeth but I need to get away from the way she's looking at me even more. I don't deserve it.