Honestly, there was a time when I thought my bus would never run out of fuel. No other station to stop at except your doorstep but now I find your doorstep isn't meant for a bus. Not enough space, too close to your door and a whole other things.
It's been a while since I've been parked on your doorstep but now it's time to drive away. Find me again, find my path, find my route, create a map filled with cherished memories that no longer involve you. You're no longer placed on that pedestal I loved so much, pulled down and replaced by a blank map.
A blank map where I can write and draw, travel, find and get lost. A map made by me, for me.
A map that'll come to hold precious memories. Fun times, love and one day...happiness. A map of my life.
You know, I honestly loved you and I think that as usual. I came to love you more than I loved me, so that after you left I no longer loved me, I no longer loved the things that I used to. Because I longed for you, i closed my eyes to every other possibility. I refused to see those who sincerely cherished me because my sight was so focused on you.
I would have given you the world if it was mine to give. I would have gone to war for you but how do I go to war against the one person I want to fight wars for? So I swallowed my feelings, swallowed my pride, destroyed my heart and lay it at your feet as a sacrifice for your happiness.
You claimed to still love me, to want me (laughs bitterly). But you made everything about you, you refused to see that I was hurting just as much, if not more. You didn't care what became of me as lot as you got your petty revenge. But who do I go to for mine?! Who do I hurt to feel better?! Who do I crush in the attempt to save myself the heartache? It all still comes back to me...
I'm the one who's hurting, I'm the one who has to let go but can't seem to. I'm the one who's still hurt for not letting go.
What do I do then? Where do I go? What becomes of me?!
All I have left is an empty tank , a broken heart and a blank map. How then do I find the next bus stop?!
YOU ARE READING
The window into my life.
Non-FictionWell this are actually my thoughts,kind of like poems yet not,like philosophy,yet not. It's how i view life and how i try to handle it. Its my reality and yet still a part of my essence,like spirit and body trying to be made sense of by the soul. Re...
