Listening to Katherine (girlxgirl)

2: I Only Needed To Know Her Name

I couldn't stop thinking about that kiss. That was perhaps my very first real kiss. It had me on cloud nine for a week. I could still remember how it felt. It was like that chocolate I had when I was a child, and I just couldn't stop feeling every inch of it. She wasn't exactly my first kiss, but it felt like it. I wished I kissed her back. But it was just so stroppy for me.

She did not come back in front of our lawn after that incident. It had me wondering. Did she finally realize that she was disturbing my parents? No, I did not think so. She was constantly there even if my dad made her leave. She was determined to stay there unless someone told her it was unlawful to sleep on our bench. But I figured, no one had told her yet.

Did she finally find out that the bench she was sleeping on was really covered in our property and not the government's? No, I didn't think so as well. I knew she loved that bench. It was sheltered by a tree just beside it. It was comfortable, cosy and cool. If no one cared, I, myself, would sleep on it.

Was she really intoxicated when she kissed me? Yes, I could smell her from a foot away. I could not make out what it exactly smelt like. But she was gulping beer, so she definitely smelt like beer. I was not good at this.

Was she sober enough to pretend she was drunk and kiss me on purpose? Oh, I wish she was when she kissed me. This was the only explanation stuck in my mind after her disappearance. Perhaps, she liked me. Perhaps, I was being a little bit delusional. I just needed to see her again and ask her questions. I hadn't even acquired her name yet, and she went to kiss me! It was driving me insane!

Until seven Mondays passed, I suddenly was all over her, her face, getting her name, and the kiss. I hadn't thought of her. It was strange how a feeling just all of a sudden slowly fades and eventually wanes. That was how I literally felt. And I knew, she was all just one major crush.

***

"Do you know that light doesn't age?" Gabriela started. We were in the physics lab at that moment when she began her daily facts. She and I sat beside each other only because I wanted her to be my lab partner in case our physics teacher asked us to find one. Also, because I was so slow at this subject. I had to copy answers from her.

"Um," I raised my brow. "Of course, it doesn't, only living organisms age."

"Uh, hello? How about the Earth, huh? It ages through time. It's 4.54 billion years old!" Gabriela said.

"So our planet ain't a living thing?"

"No. It's just like other planets, the earth is entirely a non-living thing. But plants and animals and mushrooms and bacterias make our planet a liv---"

"Bacteria," I corrected her. "It's bacteria, not bacterias."

"Oh."

"Yep," I jokingly winked.

"Whatever."

"My turn," I grinned at her. "Have you heard about the Malthusian catastrophe?"

"No, and I don't care. Does this have something to do with starvation and apocalypse?" Gabriela frowned. She was anxious with regards to doomsday. And she believed the world was definitely going to collapse by 2050 due to overpopulation and lack of resources, and this was a bit of the Malthusian catastrophe I was saying. To me, it didn't make any sense. I only wanted to scare her.

The class was ending and I decided not to listen to my teacher. Instead, I began thinking about purchasing a slice of pizza. During that day, it was all I could ever imagine, even Gabriela's face was looking like a slice of it in my eyes.

I kindly asked Gabriela to walk home with me, but she declined. She said I should tell her the truth about my sexuality. She was forcing me to do it. If she was truly a friend of mine, she wouldn't have forced me to come out if I wasn't ready yet. She was being senseless as well. What if I wasn't really a homosexual? Would she still want me to admit, even if it wasn't true? I got infuriated at her and walked home all by myself, cursing my way to the pizzeria.