Second Fate

3

Seven Years Ago

"I must've forgotten it here when I stayed over last Friday ... I'll go grab it from Neal quickly, and I'll be down in a second", promised Cara while she was already half-up the wooden staircase of the mansion.

"It's alright ... but hurry."

Since Jenny was expecting us to return with some vegetables and juice from the local supermarket, we had to go and fetch Cara's purse from the mansion. It was a pretty building, freshly renovated, but I didn't feel at ease in here. A few weeks had passed since she'd started to date the owner of the house and I'd been over a couple of times for coffee or snacks, but I always felt watched here. As if everyone was standing on attention while I was visiting.

If I hadn't spent my last bucks on drinks over the weekend, we could've avoided this pitstop.

I could hear someone humming in the garden, while the rest of the house was silent. For once, there wasn't a handful of people spread out through the lower levels, talking, laughing, and working with each other. The good weather must've lured them outside.

All but one. I knew the owner of the footsteps before his broad-shouldered frame came into my sight of vision.

"Are you here with Cara?", he asked brusquely.

I pulled my dark eyebrows together and frowned at him because he was staring me down. "Yes, and? Am I not welcome?"

"I didn't mean to – you just haven't been here for a while."

"No one invited me."

"Cara can have you over with her whenever she wants to", he replied in a matter-of-fact tone.

"If she wants me to, I'm sure she'll tell me."

My voice had been a little sulkier than I'd intended, and I could feel his attention rise.

"Are you ... alright?"

Our gazes locked and the humming in the distance fell silent as I swam in those emerald pools. I hadn't noticed it before but there was a strange glow to his eyes at times. It didn't feel cold or abrasive even though his words were terse.

It felt like ...

"Not really."

His lips opened a little in surprise, but no sound came out. He had to clear his throat before he spoke. "Did something happen?"

"Nothing in particular, it's just ... I don't know what I'm doing. And there's so much pressure on me to do the right thing."

The words had broken out of me before I knew it and Vine's green eyes seemed to issue a silent invitation for me to explain.

"I mean, I've never thought about the rest of my life. I thought it would be a little short, to be honest", I repeated nervously. The words had been on my mind for weeks or even months maybe, but I had never told anyone. There was no one with an opinion I gave two cents about in my life. Jenny was the closest thing to a role model, but at the same time she wasn't. She wouldn't understand, no one did. So why was I telling him of all people – and why now?

"But now you think it might be longer?", he asked. It was a genuine question, which took me by surprise.

I tried not to let it show and gave a shrug. I'd been trying to cut down on drinking and smoking, declining invitations more often. I could already count the remaining friends I'd left on one hand; the rest had started to grow bored of me.

"Maybe. But that means I need to figure out what I'm going to do with myself. Jenny wants me to study and go get a degree, while Cara thinks love and a family is how you become happy. And everyone is mad at me for doing what I've always done, floating. But I don't care about college, and I don't want kids, I don't think."