i wish i hated you, 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘴

chapter one

Present Day, 2019

DESPITE HOW many times she had done this, her nerves were still on fire. Her stomach was churning and she was unsure if it was the lack of nutrients coursing through her veins. Love had lost count of how many therapists she had cycled through over the years, and stopped keeping track after the fifth provider. She never once played into the stigma of therapy. Because in reality, therapy was for anyone and everyone who sought after help. And Love desperately needed help.

Although, she refused to let her boss be aware of how her free time was spent. She'd simply call them her shrinks.

The waiting room she found, was cold, but it could have just been because her seat was directly under the vent. It was an empty room, save for the receptionist scrabbling away at her keyboard. The little noises crescendoed as she remembered the sole reason she was here.

The grief, the low-self esteem, the mommy issues, the unrequited love she carried for her boss's husband who was technically also her boss...The list droned on. And every therapist had offered up the same solution: quit and start a new life. Move on. Explore the world. Find herself, maybe even lose herself.

But, she loved Lily Donaldson as much as she loved the little girl's father. Her love for the girl she nannied—raised even—, outweighed—no—conquered her distaste (hatred was a strong word that Love heavily disregarded) for Tashi Donaldson.

A door creaked open. "Love Sumners?" A voice echoed. She must have been the therapist, with her chestnut locks pulled up in a high bun, and a lavender colored coat hanging off her shoulders. She gestured for Love to follow her into the office.

Love found a seat on a cream colored bean bag chair and stuffed her hands in her pockets. A gesture she found comforting in times like these. Her eyes flitted across the room as she attempted to scope out her surroundings. Over the years, she discovered that every therapist had their own tells to their own practices. From experience, the worst therapists had the most sterile appearing offices. They would evoke the bubbly feelings of anxiety in her chest, her muscles would stiffen, and she would answer any mandatory questions with quick answers in order to flee the area as soon as possible. Like a child awaiting their doom at a doctor's visit.

Dr. Frazier followed suit and curled up in her chair sitting directly across from Love.

"Miss Sumners," she proceeded with caution, but it was gentle all the while. "Let's start from the beginning shall we?"

Love let out a breath she had no idea she had been holding onto. She gave a timid nod. She chose not to speak yet.

"We're in this together, okay? I don't have any previous records, so you tell me. Wanna start from the beginning?" Dr. Frazier teetered past the caution tape. She hadn't the slightest idea the type of crime scene she was about to brave.

Love nodded again and shakily added a breath. "Okay," her voice sounded as if she hadn't spoken in years. Or as if she had been silenced for quite some time.

She felt like she had been.

authors note
aaaand here is chapter one! i really hope this is something that sparks your interest and you fall in love with this character i thought up during my lectures lol! i know it's short but next chapter we dive into more of love's relationship w tashi and maybe even the boys if we get to it! i really just want to give a preview of what is going on inside loves head because i kind of want to represent her as somebody who was forced to be the victim because nobody taught her otherwise if that makes sense. i will try my best to follow the timeline but it will be difficult due to how many times they jumped around in the movie (so inconsistently too). and im pretty sure in 2019 (according to wiki) our characters are bordering 40 from what art said??? please please don't be a ghost reader i love interacting with everyone! thank you and hope you enjoyed xoxo!