The Unploughed: Ahalya

3|Ahalya

I won't be able to push him away for long.

Every night he tries to inveigle me into being intimate. Given that the wife has a say, my 'no' keeps him at a distance. Although that doesn't stop him from tracing my curves and making me hate myself.

I know, if I don't consummate this marriage, he will tell people I am having an affair. And by chance if they find about Mahendra, his rule will be challenged.

I don't want to put Mahendra in danger. He sends letters which I half-heartedly burn to ashes. I never write him back, I dare not. And tonight, I will give Gautama the opportunity to relish me.

It shouldn't be as traumatic as I am imagining. Perhaps love isn't in the destiny of the most beautiful woman. Beauty is a curse.

The full moon reminds me of Mahendra's shine, his round face and the eternal childlike charm. I put balm on my wounds, imagining the moon to be his face.

"I miss you."

A gelid breeze weaves through my midnight locks, reminding me of the moments his own fingers would play with my tresses. I exhale, the old, phantom touch of his palm igniting in me a fire.

"Ahalya?"

I jerk out of my thoughts. Gautama is standing at the threshold of our house. "Come in," I say.

Unlike other days, there's a sadness in his gaze, a foolish fear dancing in his orbs. He doesn't undress me with his stare, but simply admires. "I missed you too, Ahalya."

His words puzzle me. I narrow my eyes, studying him closely. A gasp escapes my mouth when I see through this illusionary disguise. "Mahendra?"

"Yes!" He clasps my hand. "Sleep has shunned me since you left, Ahalya. I want to be with you."

He is hot to touch, akin to my own body. Gautama has never been able to make me feel so hungry and passionate. I want to beg Mahendra to take me, but the bondage of marriage is threatening.

"You aren't married to him. You haven't consummated the marriage. And no one asked for your consent to this relationship. It is against the values."

"Brahma decided for me. What could have I said?"

"It bewilders me that life hasn't turned its face away from you. I am here, Ahalya. You could have raised your voice even if a little, instead of regretting so badly!"

"I mourn every day, every night!" Tears spill down. "But no one ever taught me to stand for myself. Except you, Mahendra."

Mahendra kisses my knuckles. With all my strength, I attempt to yank away, but he pulls me to his chest. Our bodies are rubbing against each other. My mind goes blank, and my heart thuds wildly. "It's wrong. It's a sin."

"I love you, Ahalya. I see no sin. Let me make you happy, even if for a night."

Before I can protest, he plucks at my lips, kissing me with so much sacred devotion. I melt in his embrace. It's his sturdy arms that keep me on the floor.

"It will make me cry every other night," I whisper on his lips.

"Order me, and I shall come–"

"Ahalya!"

The scream breaks the bubble of love. My husband, Gautama, seething with rage, throws his shaft at me. On my forehead is carved a cut that bleeds into a river. Gautama then points at Mahendra, "You lowly Rajan thought you could mask yourself, but my years of wisdom gets your game. I curse you–"

"Be in your limits, Gautama." Mahendra summons a lightning bolt in his hand. "You have married a woman against her wish, knowing very well that she sees you as a father figure. You have maligned the holy bond of a parent and a child. And you think you will curse me?"

"You have committed adultery with my wife. She–"

"She isn't yours. She is a woman by her own right and can separate from you if you torture her."

"Oh, really?" Gautama scoffs. "Then, let me make her mine."

Gautama kicks Mahendra and grabs me by my hair, leading me towards the bed. I shout for help. Gautama's hands land on my back, pulling down my skirt. His impatient grunts make my stomach twist. But before he can do the horror, Mahendra's bolt charges at him. He is struck to the ground. I ran to Mahendra. "Run," I manage to say.

"With you."

I hesitate, but it's only for a moment. Soon, I cross my arm with his, and we flee from the accursed ashram.