something missing..(G!p X Girl)

14. i need you to get out.

No.

becky looked in disbelief from the engagement and wedding rings on the coffee table to her wife's face....

she couldn't speak...

she felt like she couldn't breathe, either....Like all the oxygen had been pulled out of the air by the terrible thing freen had said.

It's over.

It couldn't be over....It couldn't be.

Not after everything they had gone through, not after the way they felt about each other.

freen pulled herself up off the couch and becky followed her as she walked slowly to the spare bedroom.

No one had used it; it held only a daybed and a small chest of drawers. She sank onto the small mattress and didn't look at becky.

But becky felt as though, if she let freen walk out of her sight, if becky didn't stop talking to her, trying to convince her...then it really was over.

But freen couldn't mean what she was saying.
She was upset; she had just lost the baby, after all. She didn't know what she was saying. She couldn't.... becky just had to make her realize that.

becky wiped another tear off her cheek.
"freen, I know you're upset," becky said, trying to choose her words carefully.... she didn't want to upset her any further, but a burst of anger would be easier to deal with than this terrible calm that had come over her.

"I understand that. But I... Please, just... sleep on it..."

Anything, anything, becky wanted to say, wanted to beg her.

"I have slept on it," freen said quietly. "I need you to get out."

becky face crumpled, then freen words made her heart ache and becky went through a thousand different options for becky might say, what she might promise freen, anything to get her to reconsider. But there was nothing.

becky loved her... she loved her so, so much. But she'd told her she loved her when she had been arranging to meet Jane, too...
The words didn't mean anything to freen anymore.

They were meant for each other. But both of them had broken that vow, and her friends damn words came back to becky.

Maybe they had been meant for each other... That didn't mean they were anymore.

becky would give freen anything her heart desired, but what she seemed to want most, just now, was her out of her life.

And, as much as it hurt Becky to do so, she had to admit that she couldn't blame freen.

She had just lost their child and the stupid choices becky had made might have directly caused it...Of course freen was angry and upset.

But becky didn't know how freen was ever going to be able to forgive her for that.

Not when becky wasn't sure how she was ever going to be able to forgive herself for it.