how to cry?

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“The thing that wasn’t taught to me
is to cry. To let my emotions roll down my cheeks
and feel them conquering my chest.
What I was taught to do is to push it back behind my eyeballs
and prevent it from falling.
Because if I did let them rain,
then I’m considered weak.
And so I grew up not crying over
things, no matter how big or small it is.
And I never felt so weak before
than today.
Not because I let my tears escape,
but because I held them for too long,
and they found another way to hurt me.
Internally.”

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