Never thought you'd happen to me

Chptr 7 : And You had a bad dream

possible tw : panic attack, description of car crash.

*Flashback/nightmare*

My breath caught in my throat as the loud, sudden sounds of screeching tires, metal crumpling and glass shattering invaded my ears. We had been hit, one moment we were driving home on the bridge and next we were in the car, in the inky, ice cold river. My eyes flew open from the impact, previously asleep. I remember seeing a flash of fire from the car that had hit us, stark contrast reflecting off the dark water. My entire world was surrounded by darkness, my lungs gasping for air as I struggled to find my way out, find my dad, find anything. Water surrounded me, submerging my feet, pouring into the car. My dad yelled for me, telling me to get out. I frantically scream back "No, I won't leave you dad."

*End of flashback/nightmare*

—————
emily's pov :

I awake with a jolt, my heart pounding in my chest and my body covered in a cold sweat. My throat seemingly hoarse, fuck, had I been screaming? I breathed deeply for several seconds, struggling to calm myself down. I start to sob frantically, shaking like a leaf. I don't even remember Phoebe's there until she places her hand on shoulders, making me jump.

"Hey- woah are you okay?" She says, her voice groggy from sleep but clearly concerned.
"N-no, yea I- I'm sorry I just had a nightmare it scared me." I choke out, some memories of the accident, that horrible night come rushing back. I feel a lump form in my throat, coughing to clear it, the coughing doing nothing but making it harder to breathe. I clasp my chest. "Hey hey, you're ok." She brushes some of my hair out of my face. I look at her, tears pouring from my eyes, she's looking back at me like she knows it was more than just a bad dream but she doesn't know what exactly it was. "You're ok, look at me. It was just a nightmare alright? Nothing's wrong, you're safe." "I- no-... I know."

I don't though, I don't know that I'm safe. It's like I can still feel the chilling water dripping off me as I cry, the sirens blaring and the lights reflecting on the river, watching my dad getting pulled from the water, seeing resuscitation being started before I'm pulled away by another paramedic. I try to breathe deep but all I can manage is a tiny gasp of air. I look at Phoebe. "I- ... I can't- breathe." I gasp again, desperately needing air. This had happened before so many times, but tonight was particularly bad, after a while with no major nightmares. My body was shaking. I grip onto Phoebe's arm for dear life. She looks at me worried, not completely sure what to do. "You're having a panic attack." She says, seemingly trying to reassure me that I wasn't dying. "I- I know- It's... not the- first." I pause between each word to gasp for more air. My tears had stopped at this point, too much else was happening. "O- Ok. I don't know what you've been through but you're here now ok? You're safe." She replies. Phoebe takes a deep breath before speaking. "Breathe with me ok? In.. and out. Repeat. I know it's hard, I'm here." I stare into her eyes, breathing like she had said. In and out. In and out. I slowly start to calm down, still shaking but my breathing had leveled. Phoebe took one of my hands in hers squeezing it tightly. "There we go." She said softly. "Th-thank you." I say after a moment.

Exhausted, I rest my forehead against her shoulder. "I'm really fucking sorry you had to see that- had to deal with that." I say once some silence has passed. Phoebe pulls my head off her chest, so she can look at me as she firmly but kindly says. "Nonsense. You have nothing to apologise for. You're human, and sometimes that means having struggles. It's alright to admit that and for people to see that. I promise you, I know how a panic attack feels and you can't control it. Don't feel bad and don't apologise." I'm slightly speechless from her words, they meant so much.  "Thank you Phoebe- thank you so much." Tears well in my eyes again, this time for another reason. She gently wipes the tears as they slowly fall. "Don't cry, Emmy." She repositions to sitting next to me, pulling me against her chest. "Let's see if you can get some more sleep yeah?" She says softly brushing through my hair with her willowly fingers. I hesitate before softly speaking. "Ok.." I melt into her touch, my head against her chest allowing me to hear her heartbeat, there was something so comforting about it. I sniffle before closing my eyes. "Thank you Phoebe." I whisper softly before drifting back to sleep, thankfully sleeping through the rest of the night without another nightmare or flashback.

A/N !

slowly finding out more about emily's trauma and past. again hope everyone's doing good.

Remember to drink water and eat and take care of yourself. <33