LAST CUBA LIBRE

JESSICA

Everyone's eyes are on me when I walk into Coconuts with Sonia and Dalia, and I like that... The leather catsuit is making me sweat even if I am wearing panties under it, so I sit on a stool and open the zip a bit – it runs from the neck to the groin – and I fan myself with my hands, while a group of hairy arsed guys in plaid flannel shirts, round necked jumpers and baggy non-designer jeans swear and laugh together saying something about my zip.

Sonia and Dalia sit next to me and the waiter appears, passes a damp sponge over the round table and leaves us the list of cocktails and the cute Coconuts DJ mixes Ragdoll by Aerosmith and Sing for the moment by Eminem.

Sonia is wearing tight trousers in fake leather, a very bright red and a red top and Dalia is less trendy, but decidedly more sexy with fishnet tights – diamond ones – and her hair caught back in a chignon held by a velvet ribbon.

The hairy arses have a couple of dozen empty grappa glasses in front of them and they are staring at us. The waiter arrives and Sonia asks his advice, flirting like mad. Dalia flicks through the list of cocktails and complains about her contact lenses and I smile at the DJ who speaks into the microphone and dedicates to the 'three beauties who have just come in' Feel by Robbie Williams.

I order an Angel's Dream which is practically an Apricot Brandy with fresh cream in it and Dalia and Sonia order two Bellini, which the barman prepares with fruit juice since it's autumn and not the season for peaches.

The most enterprising of the hairies asks me where we are going this evening and I give myself airs. Robbie Williams is singing I just wanna feel and I get up and walk over to the bar, swinging my hips just enough to see the effect of the catsuit on the hairies – who nearly faint – I pick up a canapé with a toothpick and return to my stool, glancing at a guy in a dark Hugo Boss suit – short hair, freshly cut with a delicious shading on the nape of the neck – who is talking on his mobile.

"Cute," says Sonia

"Very." I agree.

"I was talking about Dalia's Breil."

"Oh," I say, transferring my gaze from the guy to the claw-shaped jewel that Dalia is wearing round her neck.

"Giulio gave it to me for my birthday," says Dalia and I think that her boyfriend really went over the top, since it cost ninety euro at the most and is steel, not even silver.

"How are things with you two?" I ask. In effect, since Giulio is Manuel's friend and Manuel is Tony's friend and Tony is Leo's friend and Leo is – in theory – my boyfriend, I know that they have sexual hang ups because she is totally frigid.

"Fine," says Dalia after a moment.

"I like this," she says and nods to the rhythm of Left outside alone by Anastacia which I actually like too, although it's been a bit overdone recently, what with adverts, video and Mtv.

"Delicious, those earrings of yours," Dalia says to Sonia, who is wearing pendants that are really not bad.

"Costume jewellery," says Sonia. "Sixteen euro at the market."

Dalia and I shiver hearing the word market and Sonia adds, as if she wants to justify herself, "I lose a pair a day. I'm desperate."

I lower my eyes and finish my Angel's Dream. Sonia looks over at the hairies, who are watching us and pulling faces.

"What a load of bull," she comments.

"Hands off the one with the trekking boots," I say just to make them laugh. "He's mine!"