I live with anxiety. I do for a long time now.
The first time I noticed something was going on, must've been many years ago.
I felt dizzy, my heart rate was way too fast, I felt like I'd tip over any time soon. I was scared. So scared.
"It must be a physically disease!", my brain said.
"But why does it take so long? Why is it coming back so often?", my stomach asked.
I went to the doctors so many times.
I'm a woman. I'm skinny. I don't do any kind of sports. It's normal, you will be better soon.
It got worse. So I checked in on many websites, coming up with something called an anxiety attack.
"That's crazy", I said to myself. Why would I have something like that? Don't you feel like dying when having a panic attack?
I knew it wouldn't kill me, but sometimes I wished I was dead, when it happened again.
I felt so hopeless. Will it ever stop?
Can I live life as anyone else again?
It's not fair. Why me?
But I got better. It didn't totally stop.
I get dizzy sometimes, I'm restless, I'm afraid it could happen again.
But I know, no matter how bad it is, it will always end.
