Choosing my Loyal Guard: The Dead Ends

Tristian(Part 5)

(TW: SA)

Whether it's the game system moving along the story or not, I don't know but everything becomes a blur. I don't know how long I've been locked in this tower. The maids that come in are from Tristian's kingdom and they do the bare minimum. I get bathed but it's only to keep me clean and not like a spa. Riley was always gentle and caring but these maids? I think they're just hurting me on purpose.

I don't get to wear much so I'm really cold. Only a pair of panties and a see-through robe that hates nothing. I'm also not given a lot of food so I'm losing weight too, but it only seems to excite Tristian more. He always looks at me with disgust afterward, but he comes up here almost every night to have his way. I don't know what's going on with his head but if I try to struggle he always says the same thing.

"If you break your end of the deal, I'll go out and find little Riley and that dog of a guard. Don't test me." Out of fear, I go along with what he wants no matter how much I hate it. In the county of Grikar, the wife must listen to her husband no matter what. In Adipia though, women have power and don't have to blindly follow their husbands which is why Anna was able to semi-rule while she was still just a princess.

Tonight starts like most nights. Tristian walks inside and orders me to strip, and then he's pounding into me without another word. He never takes me from the front and I assume it's because he doesn't want to see my male part. When he finishes, he normally puts on his clothes and leaves but finally, something changes from the mundane norm.

"Your people have started to rebel against me. Can't you believe it?! I've heard rumors of a rebel army too." Tristian mutters. A rebellion? A little shimmer of hope at this news. Will they get me out of here? Will they get rid of Tristian once and for all? He continues. "If they ever attack me though, they'll be completely outmatched. Grikar is known for our military after all."

That hope is then shattered. How could I forget about that? Adipia is known more for its medicine and healing. We do have an army but it isn't renowned like Tristian's kingdom. I fear if it does come to war, we will lose in one mere battle.

"It's just so annoying to have to deal with. Everyone's on my back and they're even asking for your guidance. Are you kidding me? Your only use is how you are now." He smirks a bit. "You're really good for sure... that man taught you well." Anger rushes over me. Did he really praise that bastard?

My mouth opens on its own. "Don't ever talk about that bastard to me." The anger in my voice reflects my true feelings for once. "He didn't teach me anything. He just did what you wanted just like you are. I don't see a difference between you." Tristian's eyes darken and he grabs me my by hair so I'll look him in the eye. "Don't use that tone with me, bitch." He growls and slaps me.

My head turns at the force of his strike and then I look him in the eye. I can see my expression reflected in his eyes. I'm enraged and rebellious looking which makes Tristian growl in annoyance. He shoves me away and stands up fixing his clothes. "It looks like I need to put you in your place." He turns and storms out of the room.

I glare after him and then lie down on the bed. My face stings as does my core. When will this nightmare end? Bad endings never went on this long... so is this considered a true ending? Any love I had for this character is long gone.

The maids come in and look down at me like I'm nothing. I hate their attitude. I even hear them say I'm so lucky to be Tristian's wife and lover too. What a joke! If they want him, they can have him!

They drag me into the bathroom and push me into the water. It's on the colder side today. I shiver and wince as they clean me up. One yanks on my hair too hard as she washes it while the others scrub my skin raw. None of these women respect me. I'm sure if they had it their way, I'd be dead and gone by now. At this rate... is there even another way out?

I've had dark thoughts before. Back when my uncle was abusing me and no one would believe me, I thought about ending it all. As a child, I was too scared because I didn't understand death. I only heard of it when a neighbor's daughter did it herself. So when I grabbed a razor blade to do it myself, I didn't know where to begin. Emi had found me and screamed alerting everyone in the house. I was only doing it for attention in their eyes when I just wanted the pain and gross feeling to go away.

I adopted another way to gain power as I grew into a teenager in that household too. Slicing into my fresh was still painful but it was freeing too. Still, I was too afraid of going all the way. I can't remember what my reasoning was either... it's like the more I'm Anna, the less of my previous life I forget. The only thing that remains vivid is my death. Emi pushing me... the pain of getting hit and being broken.

I'm then yanked out of the tub jolting me out of my thoughts and dried off roughly. I'm surprised I have any skin left at this point. Once I get dressed, I sit on the now-changed bed and am left alone with only some bread and a glass of water. How generous of them... sometimes they don't leave me anything at all. I eat the bread slowly to trick my body into thinking it's eating a lot more than just bread then I curl up in a ball.

I feel tears running down my face as I start to sob. Being all alone is dreadful. I know the feeling well... but everything starts to blur together. Is this Anna crying silently all alone? Or is this what I really feel instead?

~Another Night~

When I wake up again, I feel dazed and hot. The room is foggy and I smell something strange. What is that? I look over to my side table and see some incense being burned. Who decided to burn it? I sit up but my body feels like it's on fire. I hold myself and frown in confusion. Why do I feel... so itchy? My underwear feels uncomfortable. I try to stand but I stumble and fall on the floor with a gasp. What's happening to me? Panic sets in.

Have I been drugged? Was it the water I drank earlier? Or is it the incense burning in the room? I hear a door open and watch as Tristian comes inside... but my blood turns cold as I see men coming in behind him. No way... this can't be what I think it is right? Right?! Tristian is a controlling and abusive bastard but he won't go this far!

He smirks. "Oh good... our main event is awake." He purrs and walks over to me. "What are you doing on the floor?" He scoops me up and places me back on the bed. His touch feels cool... I hear myself start to purr. "You look so uncomfortable..." he takes off my robe and then moves down to my panties. "Look at this boys. This is what I've been talking about." He yanks them off and pulls me close using his fingers to spread me apart.

I can't move on my own. My body feels so hot and as he touches me, I hear a slick and wet sound. I see the men watching me with hunger in their eyes. I feel like I might have a panic attack. I've had nightmares about this before. "Tristian... no..." I hear myself say weakly.

His chuckle says it all. He has no plans on stopping here. "It looks like this little kitty is in heat." He kisses one of my cat ears that have appeared. "She's greedy too... so let's work hard to relieve her of this uncomfortable feeling." I see the men smirk as they come forward. The disgusting looks in their eyes... I feel like a freak show on display.

Tristian pours some wine and puts it to my lips. "Drink... let's make you purr even more." I have no choice but to drink it. It burns my throat and tastes bitter. What did he put in it? It has a fast effect too as everything gets hazy. This feeling is familiar to me. I used to be addicted to drugs but got clean. For some reason... I welcome this feeling because it means I can go elsewhere and not register what's going on.

The last thing I remember is Tristian's smug and dark smirk as I drift off somewhere else. If I can get do this... I can endure what's about to happen to me. I won't have to think about it. I can just fade away... and be lost in the welcoming haze.