Detective Jake Peralta leaned against the bullpen desk, grinning at his wife, Detective Amy Santiago. They had just wrapped up a case, and the precinct buzzed with the usual chaos.
"Hey, Santiago," Jake said, waggling his eyebrows. "You know what time it is?"
She raised an eyebrow. "What time, Peralta?"
"Pet name time!" he declared dramatically.
Amy rolled her eyes. "Jake, we've been married for two years. Can't we retire the pet names?"
"Never!" Jake exclaimed. "Our love thrives on them. Plus, they're scientifically proven to increase happiness levels."
"Scientifically proven by whom?"
"My gut," Jake replied, tapping his stomach.
They stood there, grinning like fools, surrounded by their quirky colleagues.
"Okay," Amy relented. "Hit me with your best shot."
"Prepare yourself," Jake said, leaning in. "I've got a whole arsenal."
He cleared his throat.
"Amy, my sweet cinnamon roll," he began.
"Cinnamon roll?" Amy interrupted. "That's not even animal-related."
"Details, Santiago," Jake said. "Details. Anyway, where was I? Right. My sweet cinnamon roll, you light up my life like a thousand disco balls."
She snorted. "Disco balls? Seriously?"
"Shh, don't ruin the magic," Jake whispered. "Next up: my fierce detective fox."
"Fox?" Amy raised an eyebrow. "Jake, I'm not a fox."
"You're foxy," he insisted. "Like a clever, crime-solving vixen."
She sighed. "Fine. What else?"
"My little avocado," Jake said, eyes twinkling.
"Avocado?" Amy blinked. "Is that because I'm green and mushy inside?"
"No!" Jake protested. "It's because you're the perfect blend of creamy and adventurous."
She crossed her arms. "Keep going."
"My brilliant puzzle piece," Jake continued. "You complete me like the last edge in a jigsaw."
"That's oddly specific," Amy said.
"And finally," Jake said dramatically, "my Santiago star."
"Star?" Amy tilted her head. "Like a celestial body?"
"Exactly!" Jake beamed. "You're my guiding star, leading me through the galaxy of love."
The bullpen erupted in laughter. Rosa smirked. Terry shook his head.
"Jake," Amy said, her voice softening, "you're ridiculous."
"But you love it," he replied.
She leaned in, whispering, "And you're my goofy detective puppy."
His eyes sparkled. "Puppy? I'll take it."
And in that chaotic, pet-name-filled moment, Jake and Amy knew they were each other's constants—their own unique blend of weirdness.
