Life can bring situations that leave you stressed for a few days, weeks, or months. Even if you're not always thinking about this, it can be like a background soundtrack playing in your life.
Finding ways to cope, including talking with a friend or trusted adult, can help protect you from the negative effects of stress.
How Can I Build Skills to Handle Stress?
How well you get through a stressful situation depends a lot on you. Here are some steps you can take to cope:
Understand the Situation
Take some time to think about what you're facing. Try to describe your situation in a sentence or two. What's stressful about this situation for you right now? It can help to write down your thoughts.
For example: "My family just moved, so I switched to a new school in the middle of the year. The stressful parts are not knowing anyone, missing my old friends, and dealing with all new schoolwork."
Once you've put the situation in words, learn all you can about it — you might read about it or talk with others. Learning helps you feel more confident and prepared. Plus, it reminds you that you're not the only one who has gone through this.
Notice and Name Your Feelings
Accept the way you feel. It can help to write down your too.
For example: "I'm mad that we had to move. I feel left out because I'm the newbie. I also feel lonely and sad because I'm missing my old friends and old school. I'm worried about keeping up in math and social studies. I guess other people would feel this way if they were in my situation."
Commit to a Positive (or Fact-Based) Attitude
A can help if you feel stuck or dragged down by unhappy feelings. It also boosts the problem-solving that a stressful situation requires. A positive attitude helps you see the options within a situation, while negative thinking narrows your view. Instead of wishing things were different, look at the facts of what's actually happening. This will put you in a better place to accept things.
For example: "My parents got new jobs here, so I know it's not possible to move back to my old school."
Don't Dwell on the Negative
Try not to get stuck dwelling on negative feelings or focusing on only the bad parts of your situation. Your power lies in how you react to — and cope with — what you're facing. Replace any negative thoughts (like "I can't do this") with more encouraging words or ways to solve the problem.
For example: "Others have switched schools before and come through it. I know I can manage this. I'll see if this school has clubs like at my old school that I can join."
Take Action
Choose parts of the stressful situation that you can change.
For example: "I can talk to the guy who sits next to me in social studies class. I'll ask if he'll share notes and study with me. That could help me make a new friend and catch up on schoolwork."
Get support.
Find someone to talk to about your situation like a good friend, , teacher, or coach. It helps to know that someone understands and cares about what you're going through. Spend time with people who believe in you, make you laugh, and help you feel good about yourself.
Care for yourself.
Take very good care of yourself when you have a lot going on in your life. If your body feels good, you'll feel better able to handle stress. Eat healthy foods, exercise daily, and get . Do something every day that helps you relax — whether it's trying yoga, taking a soothing bath, cooking, playing with your pet, taking a walk, or listening to music.
Notice life's good stuff.
Look on the bright side and try to find positive things in your life. Each day, think of 3 things you're grateful for. helps fuel a positive attitude and can help keep problems in perspective.
What if I Can't Cope With Stress?
If your stress feels too strong, happens too often, or feels like more than you can handle, talk with a trusted adult to get help and support.
If there isn't an adult to turn to, reach out to a confidential helpline. These are free and available 24 hours a day:
: Call 800-662-HELP (4357) for provider referrals in the area. Or text the local zip code to 435748 (HELP4U) for referrals. : Text "HELLO" to 741741. : Call or text 988.
How Can I Get Help in a Crisis?
If you are having thoughts of suicide, feel very hopeless or depressed, or feel like you might harm yourself or others, call a suicide or crisis hotline. They offer free help right away.
You can also turn to a crisis hotline if you have been through trauma, violence, abuse, sexual assault, or rape.
You can reach out to these resources for 24/7 help:
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call 1-800-273-8255 or call or text 988. You also can contact them through . Trevor Lifeline for the LGBTQ community: Call 1-866-488-7386, text START to 678678, or contact them through . Crisis hotlines: These help survivors of rape, abuse, violence, and other traumas. Some may also provide short-term counseling. To find one, do an online search for your state and "crisis hotline."
Other places you can go to get help:
Emergency rooms. Local hospital emergency rooms or an urgent care center can evaluate and care for people in emotional emergencies as well as physical ones. If you think you might hurt yourself or someone else, you can also call 911. Local crisis centers. To see if there's a walk-in crisis center near you, search online. Enter the name of your city, county, or state and terms like "crisis center," "crisis counseling center," "psychiatric emergency services," or "crisis intervention."
If you're dealing with a crisis, get help right away. There are people who will listen, talk with you, and help.
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