THE FLOW

Issue #009

"Lenny's here!"

Coming home always feels better every time I return. I can't say what's in the air. An argument with Sylvia can't put a damper on my parade. I've returned to my highest of spirits and, now, I'm basking in the refreshing peace that comes with entering my grandparents' home.

I should be honest, I think. A part of me has grown used to walking in with Nelly by my side. A home visit together was always fun, especially on the occasions that DeVante came with us. It's okay. I'll have to use her photos as her physical stand-in because a good time is expected to be had.

Welcoming the cheers of my little cousins, I open my arms wide upon entry. "I'm here! I'm here!" The sayings are true. Absence does make the heart grow fonder. I wasn't treated like this until leaving for New York.

"Perfect timin'," Eddie laughs, coming to scoop me into his arms as a warm greeting. "We 'bouta eat right now! C'mon!" His weekend spent home isn't a surprise but I know when he turns 21-years-old next year, he's going to start going ghost. I did it too.

I pull up a chair next to him and fall into place like I've never left home at all. Junior has a baby on the way, Janine still doesn't have a man, and Malik is going to college. Those are the ones that are old news. Gayle got engaged, Uncle Dominic is considering retiring, and Malika won her school spelling bee. Those are the ones that are new news. The negatives are ignored. Uncle Gin's latest DUI, Aunt Marney's cancer scare, and Uncle Pete cheating on his wife with her niece-in-law. I'm focused on the positives.

"Na' where you been, Lenny," Uncle Gin asks, turning half of the room's attention to me. My throat runs hot and dries up. I didn't know it'd be my turn so quickly.

My mother smirks, glancing up at me, with her left hand twirling wine glass by its stem. "Tell 'em where you've been, Lenny." Her delivery is one of a woman in the know. Albeit I haven't told her anything about Jared, my mother continues to suspect a man has come and founded his place in my life. Sadly, he isn't the kind of man she would expect.

"I've just been... Y'know..." I shrug, stalling to find the words I need as all eyes are planted on me. "Working mostly."

Papa Fred points his fork at me. "Uh huh. Workin'." His lips and nose scrunch together, lettuce from his salad dangling off of his fork as he jabs the air in my direction. "That's all y'all do," he teases. "Work, work, work!"

A nervous laugh is hidden behind my cup as his wife jumps in. "She probably got herself a nice little life up there," nods Granny. "A good job, a good house or apartment or whatever..." Her eyes remain on me as she tilts her head. "A good man..." Her pause because a question mark.

"Uhm..." My decision is made on a whim. Sure, I'll admit that I'm a committed woman. "Well, yeah." Nodding, a smile graces my lips. "Yes to all of the above."

"Just like Nelly," Junior points, laughing. "Gone to New York City and gotta man. Now you too good to come home, huh? You cain't call or nothin'!"

I drop my head to revoke them the privilege of witnessing my blushing. "It ain't even like that," I exclaim, shaking my head with a laugh. Composed, I lift my head as my eyes shoot to my grandparents. "Papa, Granny, it's not like that."

"It's not," taunts Papa Fred. "'Cause it's lookin' how it's lookin'."

"I've lived in New York long before I met him," I say, trying to make my case with as little details as I can. I'm trying but this is hard. "And I already knew him before you guys started getting on me. I've really just been working that much. It's a lot going on at the office."

My bait for a discussion about my job is cast into the water on my strongest line. They don't care. My family swims right past it, gunning for further details of my personal life. I have to take a deep breath because I know the questions are about to come flooding in. Family dinner has turned into a Question & Answer session about Lenetta's personal life. I can't believe I set myself up this bad.