Cries of Fate

not anymore

"Vaeille, wake up, don't leave me here " the cries of my fiance wakes the sleeping sense of mine, I'm at the hospital again, as usual, nothings new I'm like this at least ones in a month, checking my heart out if it still connected to my heart string...
"Sav, lovelyway" Saying his name doesn't feel like home anymore, the bitter taste of lies, making me sick
"You don't need to talk, Vaeille...  Put your hand where it hurts, pls let me know" hearing the sob it's making me weak even more, I know everything... But I do as he told , putting my and his hand up in my chest;letting him feel my heartbeat my last time...
"H-here, it does hurts alot, and here my mind don't know what to do any longer, it's aching like hell... I can't hear you properly, my vision it's becoming blurry my hand it's giving up I can't even feel anything anymore" it hurts a lot shuttering after saying those words...
"My can't leave, rn... You promise to take meds and have medical care in US pls I'm coming with you don't give up not yet... Vaeille love"
"Sav, I can't hold it any longer... Pls just put my heart in my little sister just do as we planned, that's the only way I could tell that I do love her, she suffered , and it's too much, young me won't be able go
handle that... " Begging him doesn't change the fact that I was about to giveup that I was so close to see heaven and earth from above... That my someday is now and my soon will be in a few
"D-dont leave her, Sav... It's us who she can count of, don't think twice when she calls answer it immediately... Pls just this once I'm begging you be with her as her brother... I have a plan on how to give her my heart without actually telling my condition... Tomorrow morning before my flight I want to play with her again" That's the only thing that I can do she sacrifice alot... She cried, before, I saw how she begged God to take away the pain so she can stay and play with me... My innocent sister is suffering and besides I feel like im forgetting things already at time goes by their laugh becoming so unfamiliar
"I love you, Sav, I will always and willing to paint the clouds with beautiful colors just for you... " The goodbyes, my words doesn't came out like what I had planned to... I'm a writer but all I know right now is that leaving him means saving her, and saving her means letting go and letting go goes to accepting the fact that I won't be here tomorrow that the light of the star wasn't the first thing that I'm going to see instead I will be one of them shining brightly while being admire by many

"The deep quotes that I have been reading doesn't effect me anymore
As if my own mind doesn't want me to go deep down to the truth like before
The history is repeating it's self like its some kind of movie that keeps playing at the background of my life
It keeps playing until I fall asleep at night"

Brightest star
   Vaeille ♡