Behind the Lights (Tommen legacy 1)

Chapter Thirty

Silver Springs" by Fleetwood Mac blares from the speakers of my new car. My birthday was a week ago, meaning Christmas is only three days away, and my parents got me a BMW X5. Gracie sits next to me with a thick wool scarf wrapped around her neck and a basic sweatshirt and sweats.

She belts out the lyrics while taking sips of the McDonald's milkshakes we bought earlier. Winter break started four days ago, and Gracie and I have been attached to each other's hips, hanging out every hour and sleeping in each other's beds at night.

We haven't done anything but kiss since we've been together, and I'm okay with that. I want to take things at Grace's pace and never pressure her into doing things she doesn't want to do. But I don't think she wants more; I believe that she is afraid that doing anything more will take her back to that night. I want to show Grace that her body is meant to be worshipped, not hurt.

Gracie continues to sing the chorus as I watch her with a grin, "Should I be concerned that you are singing this so emotionally?" I cock my eyebrow at her.

"What, no?" why would you be concerned?"

"It's a song about a breakup,"

Realization hits her face, and then she breaks into a giggle.

"It's just a good song, Rory. Don't be silly; I would never break up with you,"

"Good," I say before leaning across the counsel and capturing her lips in mine. She kissed me back with the same intensity as she parts her lips and I slid my tongue in.

My cock hardens against my jeans as she moans into my lips.
One minute, we are kissing; the next, Gracie goes completely still against my lips.

"Gracie?" I pull back to find her eyes green eyes distant and welling with tears.

I reached out to her, my touch firm but gentle, trying to bring her back from wherever her mind had wandered. "Hey, look at me, Gracie. Focus on my voice," I urged, my eyes pleading with hers.

But she seemed lost, haunted by memories that were tearing her apart inside. And then it happened—her hands shot up to her face as if she wanted to claw away the pain.

"Gracie, stop!" I yelled, shocked as I tried to stop her from hurting herself. But she was in her world of agony, not hearing me, scratching at her cheeks and leaving red marks. I tried to bring my hands to her to get her to stop, but she backed away, desperate to get the farthest point away from me like I was a disease.

My heart twisted seeing her like this, feeling so helpless. I kept trying to get to her to stop her, but she kept avoiding me; her hands moved to her hair next, pulling at it so hard it made me wince.

"Please, Gracie, stop," I begged,

But she couldn't hear me, lost in her panic, Her breathing erratic.

Finally, when I reach out again, she does not move away. I gently grab her tiny hand, removing it from her face and hair.

"Gracie, listen to me," I said softly.

She looked at me then, tears streaming down her face, her eyes full of emotion. "I can't... I can't calm down," she whispered, voice cracking, as she was gasping for breath.

I held her gaze, "Yes, you can, Gracie. You're stronger than you know," I assured her.

Her frantic movements started to ease, her breathing becoming more steady. But the aftermath was gut-wrenching—her nails marked her skin, and her hair was tangled from pulling.

I gathered her into my arms, holding her close. "I've got you, Gracie. You're safe now," I murmured, kissing her forehead. She whispered into my chest.

"I'm sorry," Gracie whispered, her voice heavy with guilt.

"Don't apologize, Gracie. You're not alone," I reassured her, holding her tighter.

She leaned into me. "It just... comes out of nowhere sometimes," she confessed.

I nodded, understanding her struggle all too well. "I know, Gracie. And that's okay," I said, soothingly running my hands through her hair and combing the knots with my fingers.

She cries into my chest when I run my hands through the parts she just ripped out.

"Shh, I know, I know," I whisper, cradling her closer to my chest.

We sat in silence, just me holding her as her cries subsided. Words were only sometimes necessary when you had someone who understood without needing explanations.

After a while, Gracie looked up at me, a vulnerability in her eyes. Rage hit me that moment, knowing that someone had made Gracie feel like she couldn't be variable and that she was afraid of living to the fullest.

"Thank you for being here," she said sincerely.

"Always, Gracie. Always," I promised, sealing my vow with a loving kiss on her forehead.