what is silence? (WIP)

Camile Oakwood.

"silence."

"thats all i could think about, that terible feeling of the silence."

"im all alone now."

until a few seconds ago,

"Camile come do the dishes!" i sighed before sitting up in my bed. i moved around my toes to wake them up i slowly got off my bed and left my room. as i entered the kitchen my mum looks me up and down and rolls her eyes. "why are you failing all of your online classes young lady? i mean, your literally doing online school how is it even possible for you to-" she stopped speaking for a second "you havent showered in a week, your failing and you never leave your room. you are so lazy..." 

i look at the floor "im sorry mum i will do better.." i feel the tears forming in my eyes. i rub them to make it look like im just tired. i turn on the sink and roll up one of my sleeves, one arm in perfect condition. the other covered i band aids and scars, my mum had left the room already. i began to wash the dishes only thinking about the silence i had earlier, the way it felt. it felt like home. a tiny smile crept up on my face thinking about the silence. i really love the quiet, its my only true "happy place".

once im finally back upstairs i stare at the ceiling. there that silence was again. even though i like the silence i wish there was someone in the silence with me. but this will work, i dont wanna be greedy.. "what is silence?" i mutter to myself. a new thought to fog up my mind. i lay there and think about it for a good 10 minutes. when i finally snap out of this little trance i was in i looked at my vanity drawer. thats where i hid my "special stuff" i stood up and walked over to the desk, i took out a little cylinder shaped item with a liquid inside it. i took a puff of it and waited for it to kick in. my mum would be so upset. smoking weed at 14!?!? you are such a problem child. that doesnt pass my mind though. i lay down and eventually fall asleep. my brain is filled with one thought 

"what is silence..?"