the devil may care // s.reid

chapter 6 - i look disgusting in orange

tw: mentions of drugs, addiction and being high, talk about therapy and negative feelings

After getting home from Reid's apartment she rolled herself a joint. This day was rough and her whole body was hurting so she didn't really blame herself for smoking. The joint was now gone and she finally started to feel all the pain fading away.

Her phone ringed and she picked it up. The contact name 'Big boss Hotch' laid before her eyes and to be honest Melanie freaked out a little. "Oh hey Hotch what's up?" Moreno answered to the call. "I'm sorry to call you back in so fast, but we have a case" Hotch said. Melanie felt her heart skip a beat. "I'll get there as soon as i can" she replied and with that the call was over.

She didn't know what to do. Her first instinct was to call Reid and that's exactly what she did. "Reid did Hotch call you already?" Melanie asked panicked. Spencer asked if she was okay after telling that Hotch had already called him.
"I'm like really fucking high, i can't drive and i most definitely can't be around some FBI agents" Moreno told him. "Wait you are high? Melanie why?" Spencer asked with a worry in his voice. "My whole body is still hurting like hell and i just needed it to stop" she admitted. "Okay stay there, i'm going to pick you up and we are going to figure something out" Reid said calmly and then the call ended.

— — —

Melanie saw Spencer's car in the front yard. She put her sunglasses on and walked out of her apartment with her bag in the other hand and her crutches in the other. She wasn't hurting so she didn't really need them. As soon as Reid saw the situation he got out of his car, took her bag and helped her into his car.

"Why aren't you taking your pain medication if you are hurting?" Spencer asked while starting the car. "They gave me OxyContin and that's like really strong and addicting medication. I threw them out as soon as i got them" she started explaining. Obviously she didn't have any filter in her words, saying everything that came to her mind.
"And like i said i don't use anything else besides weed. It would suck to be addicted to another drug as well. Not that i'm addicted to weed, i only use it to clear my mind and take away the physical pain and-. I am going to stop talking now. My point was- actually i don't remember my point anymore" Moreno rambled speaking faster than usual.

"Oh my god, Hotch will kill me. Or worse fire me" Melanie panicked while Spencer slightly laughed at her. "Why are you laughing. Spencer I'm going to be stuck in a prison for the rest of my life! I have to wear orange, i look disgusting in orange. The food sucks and i'm going to die alone" Moreno panicked. Obviously this situation was funny to Reid and if Melanie was sober she also would've thought that her words were hilarious.

"Melanie relax. We are going to tell everyone that you took your pain medication before Hotch called. They'll all understand that you are legally high and that you can't do anything about it" Reid explained the plan. "Reid you really are a genius" she responded with a smile in her face.

— — —

Reid and Melanie arrived to the destination and the team was surprised to see them arrive together. Spencer was carrying her bag as she tried to use the crutches which was surprisingly difficult while being high. "Why are you wearing sunglasses, it's literally 1am" Morgan asked while looking her suspiciously. "Well handsome i'm high as fuck and obviously trying to hide it from you guys" Melanie answered and everyone expect her and Reid laughed a little. Even Garcia was there with the team.

"No i wish she was joking. She took her pain medication just before Hotch called and asked me to pick her up since she is actually really high" Spencer explained the situation. "She wouldn't stop singing that one Kesha song once she heard it from the radio" Spencer told the team.

"Omg i already forgot that, it's such an amazing song" Melanie said before starting to sing it again: "Zip your lip like a padlock and meet me in the back with the Jack at the jukebox. I don't really care where you live at, just turn around boy, let me hit that. Don't be a little bitch with your chit chat. Just show me where your dick's at. Music's up-".
Melanie was rudely interrupted by Hotch. "I think we've heard enough Melanie, lets get into the jet" Hotch said while her teammates were laughing.

— — —

The plane ride was going to be long so everyone was sure that Melanie would sober up during it. That also meant that they were all stuck with a high Melanie in this small plane the whole time. "I should start doing this getting high thing more often, i feel so smart right now" Melanie said to her team. "Have you guys ever thought about how sexist some languages are. Like in Spanish all nouns have a gender and can be either masculine or feminine. And like the translation for Spanish word zorra is bitch or slut. But the male equivalent zorro has a positive meaning" Melanie rambled to her team. Her brain was running so fast right now, god how much did she smoke.

"So Melanie how are you doing" Spencer asked her but she just gave him a death stare. "Wow that's sneaky, trying to get me to talk about my feelings now that i have no filter" Moreno said with a small chuckle. "Joke's on you, i only talk to my therapist" she continued while lifting her legs on the couch. She was now lying comfortably on the couch.

"She told me that i should talk to you about how selfish and horrible i feel. And like yeah i understand that it's normal to feel selfish after pretty much everyone you love gets put into prison and you are out here pretending to be a hero. I could visit them but my therapist just keeps telling me that i'm too ashamed to face them and that's why i haven't visited them. They would probably disown me if they found out that i'm working for the FBI...again. It would be so embarrassing to talk about all this out loud" Melanie rambled obviously not really realizing that she was in fact talking about this with her team.

"Oh my poor baby" JJ said silently. The rest of the team didn't really know how to react. She was finally talking about her feelings but this was clearly something that she didn't want to tell them. And here she was opening up by accident because she was high. "Guys, we really need to get like a snack box or something" Moreno continued talking still not understanding what she had just confessed. "Garcia could you please get a snack box for this jet. It would make everyone happier" she continued innocently.

"Hey Melanie why don't you try to get some sleep, it's going to be a long day after landing" Garcia said while putting a blanket over her already laid down body. "Garcia you need to promise to get me a snack box for the flight back, then i can try to sleep" Moreno said now looking directly at her friend. Or at least she thought they were friends. The team probably still hated her, she was an criminal and an angry emotionless woman after all. She didn't know why it meant so much to her, but she just needed to hear Garcia promise. "Sweetheart, i promise" Garcia said softly before Melanie closed her eyes.

The whole team stayed quiet while Melanie quietly drifted into sleep. No one wanted to wake her up. They all knew that she was going to be a mess when she was sober and realized all the things she did and said. They felt bad for her but the team agreed that they would never speak about her confession again if she wanted to pretend it never happened.