𝐆𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈

𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐞

   

As night fell, I headed to my room. My room was a mess, and I hadn't had the motivation to clean it up. I began to pick up some of the clothes scattered across the floor, tossing them into the dirty laundry basket. As I did, my hand brushed against my sweater.

     The one with Gemini's blood still staining it from that night. Instantly, flashbacks flooded my mind - Gemini's hand reaching out to me, the sound of the gunshot. I clutched the sweater, unsure of what to do with it.

   I couldn't keep it like this forever, but the thought of washing it felt like erasing a part of what happened, a reminder of the person I lost. The bloodstains told a story, one that I wasn't ready to wash away just yet. Maybe someday, but not tonight.

  Just as I was lost in thought, a knock at my door broke the silence. Then my dad entered. "What you up in here doing?" he asked, scanning my room.

"Nothing, just cleaning up a little bit." I gathered my shoes and tucked them away in my closet.

"I'm glad you're doing that" he said, holding up a Polaroid picture in his hand. "Look at what I found."

"Oh lord, what did you find?" I asked as I sat down beside him on my bed. He handed me the photo, and I took it looking at it.

  It was a picture of me and him, my dad straight-faced and me kissing him on the cheek. "I remember this" I said, laughing, reading the wording at the bottom: "I love my daddy, forever."

  It was so cute; I meant it too. I was a daddy's girl since day one; we've always been so close.

"Man, I was just looking at this and I was like, damn, I got two beautiful girls... like God really gave me two of y'all" he said.

   "I used to want a boy so bad, but being a girl dad made me realize how strong I am. Raising two young queens on my own wasn't easy, but I think I mastered it."

He pointed to the picture, "This little girl right here has lost before, but this little girl isn't so little anymore. So now it's up to what you do with the loss you have now." My daddy tells me, and I know exactly what he means. He has a way of saying things and making them mean something.

   I've lost my mom, not to death, but to distance. My first heartbreak was with my mom. She left us, no excuses, no explanations. She decided that if she and my dad weren't going to be together, then what was the point of taking care of us? It sounds dumb, but it's the truth.

   My whole life, it hurt not having a mother. I learned to forgive, but I'd never forget. We needed her, and she was nowhere to be found.

My dad is my everything. He raised us on his own, and I'm grateful for that. But the pain of my mom's absence stayed, in my heart. I've learned to live with it tho.

"So you're telling me to use my voice?" I asked him, and he nodded. "I'm telling you to take advantage of the resources you have, Solem. Don't let nothing overpower you. You are so much more. You'll never be able to grieve correctly if you don't tell your truth and accept it"

Those words - "You'll never be able to grieve correctly if you don't tell your truth and accept it" - stayed in my mind.

   He was right. If I didn't speak out, how would I ever be able to accept the fact that I've lost someone close to me? Acceptance isn't easy, but something like this could be a start. And I understood where my dad was coming from. My hurt wasn't just about losing Gemini; it was also about the way I lost him.

"Whatever you do choose to do, I know you'll make me proud" my daddy says. He leans over to hug me, his arms wrapping tightly around me. He kisses me on both cheeks and my forehead.

excuse any mistakes guys. proof reading isn't easy i will keep saying lol! hope all is well. and don't mind the time stamp i don't have it in me to change it.

solem's father ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️