A Knight in Shining Palmer

Sparks Fly?

August 18, 2024

Today, Jimmy and I went to a coffee shop. It's like what we used to do when we first started dating, I was a little concerned that it would be uncomfortable, but it was quite the opposite. I had no idea what Jimmy wanted to discuss and that scared me a bit, however, Jimmy surprised me by saying that he still loved me. I almost died right then and there but I had to keep my cool. I told him that I felt the same way but I was still struggling with guilt about how we left things.

I told Jimmy that no matter how much I wanted to be with him again I didn't know if it would be a good idea. You're probably wondering Jess what were you thinking? Honestly, I knew that if we tried to be together again everyone would be happy and that would put too much pressure on a new relationship. I told Jimmy that I wanted to be with him, but I didn't want the pressure that would come with telling our friends. He told me that it didn't matter who we did or didn't tell as long as we were together. When I tell you I've never been happier I mean I was completely over the moon.

We both agreed to try again, but without telling anyone. I know it sounds weird but I didn't want any distractions from our relationship. Doing this meant we could fully focus on each other and try to fix what we'd broken. Today, I have a boyfriend and I feel like life is finally starting to get better.

Jess

Jimmy and I have never been fans of public displays of affection, but no part of me shied away when he kissed me in front of everyone in that coffee shop. In fact, that was the only thing I wanted. After leaving the coffee shop I showed Jimmy to my favorite beach and we sat there watching the waves break and children playing. At that moment, there was nowhere I'd rather be, I finally felt the happiness that had evaded me for so long.

I wanted to stay in our peaceful little bubble forever where there was no one to judge or frown upon our relationship. The only person who wouldn't be too happy about us being together again is my father, maybe he knows that I would give up everything for Jimmy and he's right. Deep down I knew that he would have to go back to DC and I would go back to being alone here, but I would still have him.

I know that if we want this to be a forever thing one of us will have to move and I am certain that I'll be the one to do it. I know a long-distance relationship is going to be hard but that doesn't matter because Jimmy is too important to lose. Soon, Jimmy will have to go back to his hotel because we don't want Kasie to become suspicious. I know she's our best friend and that's the biggest reason we can't tell her. She'd be so happy and that would put too much pressure on us and we don't want that.

I would love to stay like this forever with Jimmy watching the ocean with his arms wrapped around me, I've never felt safer. I had forgotten how at ease I felt with him, I can let my guard down and fully be in the moment because I know he'll protect me and I'm safe with him.

Despite our break, we've picked up right where we left off. It's like nothing has changed and that makes me very hopeful for us. I hope that without any onlookers our relationship will be able to flourish and thrive which will allow us to be ourselves. When Jimmy and I worked together we decided to keep our relationship out of the office which meant there was very little time that we were able to acknowledge and show our love for each other. Ultimately, our recent decision to keep our relationship private will be hard but it is essential to make sure this is the right thing for us.

If we are sure that this is a lasting thing, we'll tell Victoria and the rest of our families. Our friends will be the last ones that we tell and hopefully, they'll be too happy to focus on our secrecy.

Jimmy

Sitting here on the beach with Jess has been the best time I've had in the last few months. It's hard to describe, it feels like nothing happened but we both know we have a lot to discuss. I had forgotten how that any time I spent with her was calm. She has always been able to handle my anxiety and insecurities. It's weird how our roles are a bit reversed but that's what works for us. I love seeing her with Victoria, Jess has stepped up and been a mother to her.

I know how hard it will be but none of that matters because she is more important than the distance between us. I would love for her to come back with me right now but that would distract us from nurturing our relationship. There are still a lot of details that we need to discuss about how this is going to work. We've both hurt each other immensely and we need to repair the trust that we have broken.

I realize that we jumped back into this very quickly but it just feels right. The problems that led to our breakup seem childish now. I think I expected too much of her, I wanted her to act like my wife without telling her this or making her my wife. A major change we will have to make is with our communication, both of us had assumed the other knew what they wanted. Most of our problems stemmed from a lack of communication and if we can fix that I can see a future with her.

We had been together for almost two years before we broke up and honestly, I didn't realize that I wanted to marry her until it was too late. I regret not talking to her about it or even doing anything about it. I never thought I would find another woman that I wanted to marry after Breena died, but Jess changed my outlook on everything. I would propose right now but I know that wouldn't be a good idea because we have a lot of things to work out.

The sun has started to set and seeing how beautiful a sunset over the ocean is makes this all feel perfect. We haven't moved or spoken for hours, we've just sat here in each other's arms savoring every moment we have together until I have to leave. This is the most peaceful moment Jess and I have had and I think we had forgotten how special times like these are. Shortly, this time was cut short by a text.

KASIE: Are you okay? You've been gone for a long time and I'm starting to get worried.

I turned towards Jess and told her, "Jess, today has been wonderful but unfortunately we'll have to wrap this up. Kasie just texted and asked about me and I should get back soon so that she doesn't get suspicious."

I could see the disappointment on her face and could tell she didn't want me to go. She told me it was okay and that we had to do what was necessary to keep our secret. Before I went, I kissed her with more passion than I ever had, I wanted her to know I loved her and didn't want her to forget today.

JIMMY: Yeah I'm good, sorry I just got distracted by the wonders of this city.