Becoming April

Chapter Six

"Have you plotted your revenge?" May asked with a fond smile as she tucked me into bed.

"How did you know?" I muttered sleepily.

"I've known him half my life, been married to him for eight years." She chuckled, stroking my forehead. "I recognized that look."

Back upstairs, we'd put the rest of her clothing haul from today into the wardrobe and drawers, put the new sheets on the bed, talked about thoughts, things she'd like us to do tomorrow, and then she'd walked me through a bedtime routine. After I'd changed into the nightshirt and sleep shorts she'd handed me (they were like my boyleg panties, hip-hugging but thicker and a bit longer in the leg) and brushed my teeth and washed my face with what she said was a "hydrating cleanser."

There were so many extra steps to being a girl.

"I just . . . warned him," I admitted. "And is this a new routine, now? Tucking me in at night?"

To my amazement she actually blushed and I got to see what it looked like on another pale-complexioned redhead. But her fingers just moved up to my scalp, lightly massaging my hairline.

"Confession?"

I nodded, not imagining what she would say.

"I love you. We love you." Her fingers paused at my inhalation, then continued their gentle scratching, her voice soft as her touch. "When we moved here, we didn't know what to expect. We put ourselves out there and hoped for the best. And there you were, slightly grumpy, a little sad, and a friend with so much to give." She looked away, obviously seeing a memory. "When my pregnancy . . . complications came in the middle of your recovery, you were as worried about me and Stephanie as Carl was. You didn't talk about it, but my husband told me you checked to see if our blood types matched just in case Steph or I would need it. It broke our hearts to know that you might not— That you wouldn't be here with us forever."

She sniffed, eyes bright, and gave me a look of determination. "So when we came over this morning to find that you'd become a beautiful young woman who would be with us for a long, long time, well."

"But I'm not me," I choked. I'd had no idea, but— "I'm not David. None of this is me, not anymore."

"Really? Do you still love Steph?"

I nodded jerkily.

"And do you still love us?"

I bit my lip, nodding harder and feeling my eyes prickle too. Hormones, yeah.

"Then all the important bits of you are still here, as much of a stranger as you might feel to yourself right now. And we love you. As for this." She ended the massage, stroking the blanket beside me and pulling it a little higher. "I think it's been too long since you had anyone to give you kisses and tuck you in. So you'll have to put up with me. Maybe not every night? Not forever anyway, just, special occasions. And when it's irresistible and it's probably going to be that for a while." Dropping a kiss on my forehead she straightened and slid off the bed.

"And don't worry. As lost as you might feel right now, you'll find yourself again. Goodnight."

She turned off the light on her way out, closing the door to leave the light from the street outside the window the only illumination. And leaving me wide awake staring at the closed door.

I finally rolled over on my side, mind completely blank.

Staring at the wall didn't help.

Last night I'd almost died in my bath. And a part of me wouldn't have thought that so bad; after the years of depression and then my heart and the fight for my life and my health, getting up every day and pushing myself on with motivating self-talk, I'd been so tired. If I hadn't been in panic mode in the agony of the moment, I might have thought that Friday, ending with my favorite friends' company at movie night and getting sneezed on by my unofficial goddaughter, might have been a perfect day and Saturday a good time for me to fold up my tent.