Insatiable Desire

Chapter#13

I sat on the couch in the lounge and thought of Skylar. Where has he gone? Will he be back at night or earlier tomorrow? Will he miss me?

Questions popped up in my head of which I had no answer.

What did he mean when he said "me too."? Does it mean that he's going to be lonely without me as I'm going to be lonely without him?

Ellanore loves Skylar but Skylar doesn't love Ellanore.

I stood up and strolled around the house finding to do something that would distract me from Skylar's thoughts but he himself was a perfect distraction in every possible or, impossible way.

The whole day I didn't feel like eating but due to starving myself I vomited at night. So I went downstairs and fixed me something to eat, even if it meant some leftovers.

While I was chewing on my noodles, my eyes caught the attention of Skylar's room. After washing my plate I walked to his room, twisted the doorknob and entered.

Smells just like you, my favourite.

I saw his discarded jeans on the bed and one of his black shirt on the chair. I went closer and picked up his shirt. I brought it closer to me and inhaled deeply trying to breath Skylar into me. His clothes smelled just like him. It was his scent and I knew it. It was the smell of his skin mixed with his Jasmine body wash and perfume with some vague stench of scotch. This was Skylar's scent. My favourite scent.

If only he was here. Even though I never had the chance to snuggle up against him but I knew he was there. There with me, maybe for me. Skylar was not my physical need, he was the need for my heart and for my soul. I just loved being around him, under his speculative gaze, his intimidating gestures and his dark rules. They all were a part of me now and I had learned to deal with them. Now they are all I want.

I know that I love him but I had never really known that I would miss him so bad if he had gone, until I discovered myself on the floor of his room sobbing hugging his shirt. It's only that you know that you love something when it had gone. You learn it's worth after you've had it and then lost it. But I loved Skylar before and I knew his worth from the first day I had started loving him.

"And he has not gone away." I spoke a bit determined in myself as I wiped away the tears from my face.

I stood up and put his shirt back on the chair. Flicking the lights off I turned my heels towards the door. Just before leaving something occurred to me and only to sleep peacefully I grabbed his shirt again, discarded mine and slipped on his shirt over me. The sleeves were too long and it was too big but having worn it, made me feel like Skylar was hugging me entirely. I felt so safe. I picked up my shirt and tosses it on the chair with myself falling on the bed. I planned on sleeping in his room, on his side and on his pillow.

Turning on the night lamp and turning off the lights in the room I finally drew myself into an uncomfortable sleep dreaming all night of shadows over my naked body with long and cold skilful fingers over my bare skin. The sensation seemed nothing like a dream.

It was ten in the morning when I woke up.

"I slept so long." I spoke to myself rubbing my eyes.

Jumping out of the bed, I went to the bathroom upstairs and took a nice bath. I wore my black set of bra and panties Skylar had once brought for me. Taking out white cotton shorts with a crop top, I wore them and admired myself I the mirror smiling to myself at the thought of Skylar coming back.

I fixed myself some toast and coffee while in my spare time I watched some TV. Well for me it was always spare time but today was different. My body had become an organ of sweet music that stirred some unknown excitement inside me.

It was finally about dusk and my heart was pounding faster every second. My head raced with questions. Should I hug him as he comes? I should kiss him, should I? I'll tell him I love him.

I was pacing back and forth in the lounge waiting for him. I had waited all day patiently that he could arrive any moment but now it was night time and I knew he'd be here.

To take Skylar off my mind for sometime I went into the kitchen and decided to make a fresh fruit salad. I placed some fruits in the table and took out the large fruit cutter disk on the shelf. I took the apple, cut it in half and pressed it onto the sharp cutter plate. The apple was cut into smaller pieces. I kept on doing it unless I heard the roar of engines from far away. And that's when in excitement, instead of the fruit, I pressed my bare hand over the sharp plate which cut my skin deeply pouring out a lot of blood. I let out a sharp cry as I saw the pool of blood on the kitchen shelf. By now I heard the door closing of the car and without caring for my hand I rushed to the door.

I heard the clicking sound of the door and Skylar entered wearing the same suit. He looked relaxed and his eyes seemed to sparkle at an unknown reason. I smiled at him with tears in my eyes not knowing that slowly I had walked so close to him that I put my hand on his chest and looked into his eyes.

Closing my eyes, I could inhale the same smell invading my nostrils.

"What the fuck." Skylar spoke in horror as his colour turned pale at an instant.