The need to feel nothing is like a storm across my skin
The tingles of dust brushing off some of my dignity
I need it, I want it; but as long as I try I cannot defend myself against the particulars of life
They aren't particularly at all I guess, more like little grains of sand that feel like boulders big enough to hold down Sisyphus
It's always crushing me, the weight of everything
I want it to be nothing but as far as I cry it's always tunes out of time
Sometimes when I take a pill, not even soemthing that's crazy but Advil is enough for it,
When I take any pill the world goes quiet and my cries stop
My shoulders are loose and I feel empty without the small rolls of tingles across my skin
Like a bottle without its wine or a paper without led, I feel incomplete
I don't feel it
I don't feel anything
It was simply a pill for physical pain but somehow it numbs my heartstrings and calms the wind in my brain
It's like the world has gone to mute and I've gone to hell
I drink the red
I drag the blade
I feel the swallow
Nothing.
It's all but worse: Feeling nothing
I'd rather feel it all than feel nothing at all
It's like the world has gone mute and I've stayed behind
I miss the tingles, I miss the winds, I miss the feeling of feeling it all
YOU ARE READING
Ghosting Happiness (POEM BOOK)
PoetryTeaser: The simple misunderstanding of the circumstances of my fear isn't that I'm afraid of spiders, or highs or of anything physically possible at all It's like a chill down my skin that causes my heart to race and the people around me to space...
