Trapped by a Kitten | lm•jnk

Chapter Seventeen

Jennie

"Baby." I didn't mean to glare as I look at the owner of the voice but irritation hinders my ability to think. Before I knew it, I was screaming in irritation against that person.

"What?!" Again, I didn't mean that. And the surprised expression and blatant pain that crossed my boyfriend's face sent me into a cycle of guilt and regret. Shit! You mess up again, Jennie!

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to shout." I slowly breath out calming my nerves but it didn't do much. I don't understand but I want to ruin something. There's this silent plea in my head to burn a city down, and I'm doing my best to follow what little composure I have inside my head. FUCK. I'm feeling so clueless over my own emotions! This is bad.

"Are you okay, babe?" His tone was worried yet I can't bring myself to reassure him. And the most mess-up thing is instead of wanting to make him feel better, I want Kai to get lost. Fuck. I want him to leave me alone because honestly, he's not helping. I feel like he only adds up to my fury!

"Yeah I'm fine. I'm sorry. I'm just really stress out. Can I go now?" I ask trying to be really nice, because FUCK! Dang it! I want to go somewhere, some place where the green-beast inside of me could lash her feelings out. I want to go where Lisa is. 

I want to get her away from Irene. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

I need to see her, or else I will lose my mind.

"I'm going, Kai." I'm so ready to lose it all, I'm so ready to give it all up just for the thought of a certain blonde but then before that, I need to end to fix things with Kai. "Go home, I'll talk to you soon." 

That's all I can give him for now. Because I need to see Lisa and tell her to wait. 

I need to stop anything that could happen between her and Irene. That thought made me go but before I could even leave, I felt strong hands stopping me.

I couldn't stop myself and glared at him. God! Why is this so messed up?!

"Don't look at me like that, Jen." He looked away as he lets my hand go. For a moment, I regained my logic, but thinking that any minute now, Lisa would have to leave and see another girl, my blood boils in irritation.

I forced myself to calm down.

"Kai, get straight to the point. I'm tired. You came here without saying anything and honestly, you're pissing me off." Kai looked hurt and shocked from what I said yet I don't feel guilty over it. And that's messed up. Fuck!

Taking a step forward, he looked straight into my eyes. I saw the pain lurking in the very corners, and I knew right away I wouldn't like where this would lead.

I can't have them both now, can I? Sooner or later, I need to chose. I have to.

But is it possible to fall in love with someone in a very short period of time and fall out of an almost three-years relationship?

Maybe. I mean, it's happening... I knew sooner or later I had to let Kai go. I needed to tell him the truth. It was inevitable. But still, I was hoping it's not today, not this way.

"You don't love me the same, do you?" I sighed. I knew I needed to get through this talk, but not today. Not now.