Hotel Falsehood

4/"That's Florida for you."

We had our layover in Tennessee, where Mr Boyido took the plane to a small garage place thing. 

It wasn't a proper airport, and I just can't stand how this wasn't anything like the way I imagined it playing out in my head.

He took us to a small office, and told us to sit in these soft chairs while he gets us something to drink.

"Can I have coffee?" Tris asks enthusiastically. "Black coffee. It's my favorite thing right now."

"She's nine years old!" I explain, "She'll be jumping off the walls!"

"No, actually, I'm ten!" Tris argues, "I literally turned ten, like ten days ago! Why do people keep forgetting?"

"Yeah, can I have a black coffee, too?" Asks Zoe, "With mint and caramel?" 

Mr Boyido writes it down on his notepad. Zoe whispers afterwards, "Mmm that would be so good."

"Mr Boyido points his pen at me, "You want any coffee, Miss Grumpypants?"

"Is there, um, hot chocolate, or-"

"We only have coffee actually, so.... hold on to that thought." Mr Boyido gives me a mean smile before moving on. "Mr Carter!"

Dad finally looks up from his phone after trying to mess with the wifi. "Yeah, what?"

"Coffee. What do you want?"

"I don't know, regular coffee."

Mr Boyido looks at Mom, who seemingly fell asleep again.

"You guys better get used to our black coffee. They sell that every morning at Hotel Doshafelo." Mr Boyido explains with a gleaming smile, "And Disney merch! For free! Isn't that just so cool? Well, it depends on the merch. The sweater I have now is a vintage from 2014, and we still sell those!"

That wouldn't make any sense. The whole point of dated clothes is that they're from the current year. His sweater is actually really boring besides the picture of the Disney World castle. Otherwise, his sweater only says Disneyland 2014.

Oh wait.....

Dad goes back to his phone, Mom continues to snore. Mr Boyido says "Stay put" and heads back to some other room.

"Hey! Mr Boyido!" I call out, which makes him stop and turn around, "Yes, my dear?"

"That... um... sweater is fake."

He does an awkward laugh, "How?"

"The castle.... it's Cinderella's castle. It's in Disney World. Your sweater says Disney Land. That's where they have Aurora's castle. It's a completely different castle."

"Same difference." He says simply.

"Something's weird." I tell Zoe once Mr Boyido leaves.

"Tell me about it, right. He's cross eyed and drives a tiny airplane." She says quietly before laughing to herself, "Where the f*ck is my ukulele? Tris, do you have my ukulele?"

So we get back on the plane, and I'm stiff his complete horror. I begin thinking about that helicopter and how that man started yelling at Zoe, Tris, and I to jump off. He did mention how people die at the hotel we're going to, and how it's on some private island.

It was nighttime now. Tris had fallen asleep on Zoe's lap, and Zoe was singing with her Ukulele, but I had to interrupt her. "We should've jumped off the plane."

"I know! That would be fun."

"No, it would not! We're so doomed."

"You think we're doomed now?" She asked eagerly, "Watch this..." She puts down her ukulele and takes a red sharpie from her pocket. To my horror, she writes on the wall, Hotel Doshafelo.

"Zoe! Why did you do that?"

"If you switch the letters around in Hotel Doshafelo.... you get Hotel Falsehood." She explains happily as she writes it down.

My jaw literally dropped. "Oh, and you're happy about this?!"

"We're YouTubers! It's a random island and a fake hotel! We're about to hit a million subscribers!"

Throughout the rest of the ride, Zoe keeps drawing on the walls. She's one of those people who is randomly a really skilled artist. I'm a really skilled artist too, but drawing on someone's airplane without asking for permission scares me. Nothing scared Zoe, and nothing scared Tris. It was sort of unfair.

We eventually arrive at our location in Florida, which was in this dry looking parking lot. Before we were exactly allowed to leave the plane, Mr Boyido walks all the way to the back of the plane with a trash bag. "Any trash anybody needs to throw out?" 

Zoe, Tris, and I gave him our trash, as we were half asleep, and too comfortable in our seats to get up. I forgot about what Zoe wrote on the wall untill Mr Boyido looks at it. He grabs a eraser from his pocket. It's the kind you use on white boards. He casually erases where it says Hotel Falsehood. He turns to go back to the front of the plane, but goes right back to us again, saying, "You know what?" Then erases everything else that Zoe wrote. 

He then gives the eraser to Tris and he says, "Keep it. It's a free magical gift."

"Thanks!" Says Tris as she takes it.

So we all follow Mr Boyido out to the airport like building, where he takes us on this train.

This train is the whole deal. The handle bars, and seats, and the whole ride was bumpy. I sat quietly, and anxiously. Tris and Zoe were asking Mr Boyido all sorts of questions. My parents were talking to eachother, looking stiff, stressed, and anxious.

I was looking out the window. We were going through these wild palm trees, and weird cottages. It felt like some sort of weird dream. 

We passed this swampy area where there was a dead alligator right there next to the train track. I almost freaked out at first.

"Oh, ha! Look at that! That's Florida for you." Mr Boyido says as he notices it, "There's snakes and alligators all over Florida. It's best to keep your eyes peeled."

Zoe begins to snap pictures out the window. I start to wonder, how fake is this fake Disney resort, anyway? I always loved watching YouTube videos about abandoned Disney rides, or creepy abandoned islands, videos that are clickable and highly popular.

This might work. Zoe and I might be famous after this. I used to be resentful about our YouTube channel, Urban Disney Magic, but now I feel like I have this weird burst of optimism, all thanks to Zoe.  

The train drops us off on a beautiful beach. The water sparkled in the sun, the palm trees swayed, and families were laughing, throwing beach balls, and surfing. The people did not look at all like they experienced people dying, or anything terrible at all.

Mr Boyido made us leave. We took out our luggages and watched him close the train doors and go off.

Once the train was out of sight, Dad put his hands on his hips and says, "I hate that man."

"Yeah, and where are we sopposed to go now? He just left us here! Mom says in frustration. 

We stood there, facing the beach water, having nowhere to go. The sun was so warm, the I could see a shadow creep up behind us on the sand. Of course, of course! It was one of those mascots. The kind that we always see taking pictures with kids, but we never hear them speak. I turn around. It was Mickey Mouse.

Author's note: Stay tuned!