Fuckboy Holland-tom x reader

(3) SELF-CONSCIOUS

//AN: Hey!!! i am going to try and post regularly but this week I've got like 12? tests :( anyways this chapter contains self-consciousness, self harm and mentions of anorexia. Also remember to vote bc it really helps<33

TOM'S POV:

I woke up and all i could think about (y/n) and why she was having a sex dream about me? I sat in my bed just thinking about her for half an hour then i heard my roomie walk in. "Tom are you going to get up or do you want me to cover for you, say your sick or some shit?" he asked whilst scrolling on his phone and you just pondered... "um go ahead no need, ill get ready quick?" he nodded at your response and you got up and started changing, when you were just in your boxers you saw your hickeys and marks around your abs... you kinda got ashamed of them? i mean you sort of agree with (y/n) about being such a fuckboy... you then threw on some black jeans and a tight white button up, i think i am going to try and fuck no one today? you thought as you left the door.

~~~~time skip to math(last period)

I walk in and see (y/n) looking sort of sad? is she ok?. I got up and walked towards he and heard people whispering "look (y/n) has her chance to use him!" i turn around really confused then i see (y/n) running out the door. And you turn to the person whispering "what are you talking about?" the girl looks at you then brings up your fanpage (// at this point tom had done some shows when he was 5? including billie Elliot so he has a bit of a fanpage) You look at a post that the fanpage released and it had a picture of (y/n) and Harry? you look at the caption which read 'This is (y/n) she is clearly using Harry to get to sleep with our beloved Tom! i mean she is so fat i don't know why else they would be with her??' You gasp and grab your phone out and post a response and dm it to (y/n) it was all about how fucking dumb they were and how she was a family friend since they were little? Afterwards you grabbed your bag and ran after (y/n).

YOUR POV:

I ran to my dorm crying my eyes out feeling like nobody understood me... no one knew what i have been threw because of how i looked.. i look in the mirror and cry even more till my cheeks were bright red and your eyes were puffy. You ended up hiding under your covers and you were looking at the post reading all the hate comments you got, then you saw a dm from Tom.. he sent a post that he made that said how much he loved you and how we were family friends so the fan account should bad off and smile a bit and hear someone walk into your room.

"um (y/n) are u here? i saw the post?" Tom asked and you sniffled a bit so new were you were.. your feelings sort of grew especially after the dream you had last night and how sweet it was that he tucked you in... waittt what am i saying he is a total fuckboy?.. but he also was nice...

Tom lifts the covers and gets under them with you and placed his hand on your leg.. "tom i... im sorry if i was using you ... i" he cuts you off and replies "(y/n) i don't know what your apologising for? you weren't using me, you are my brothers best friend and my?... crus-i mean friend... i mean tutor?" you giggle at his stuttering even though you missed the crush bit. "but to you really don't understand.. i feel so bad because...i-i-i have.. anorexia(//an eating disorder) .... and even with it im not thin enough... i am so thin that i am weak... that i have problems with spot and making new friends...."you say stuttering at the thought that you told him. He reached for your hand and put his other hand on your cheek wiping the tears off you with his thumb, "(y/n) i had no idea.. im so sorry... but if it's anything i think your pretty? and thin" he said and you smiled, wait did Tom say i was pretty? "Thanks but i... can you not tell anyone? i mean Harry is the only person who knows about my disorder and well i am adopted so my parents don't even know?" you asked as you moved toms hand of your face and lifted the covers from above you both and you sat their with the sun on you both holding hands. "um Tom?" you ask and he reply's with a simple "hum?", "thanks for being here for me? and hating on like your only fan?" you say playfully punching his shoulder, "hey (y/n)!! many people love me?" you chuckled at him, "i can tell by the many times I've seen girls tongues down your throat?" you say remembering what he really was like, "hey!! stop judging me ok? you know im trying to stop.. the amount of hickeys i have around my dick is concerning!!" he said smiling at you with a pretend disgusted face. You laugh and wonder how many times he's slept with a girl this week?

After around 30 minutes of talking you decided to ask him "you don't need to answer but.. how many times have you slept with a girl this week..?" he just looked at you and sighed, "around 13 times in the past 7 days?.. but i decided today to stop... its just a bit.. mean? like you said and i feel bad for everyone I've slept with so don't think of me like that.. forget that Tom and see the new one in front of you.." he said with truthful eyes, "ok Tom .. i look forward to seeing the new you and i hope he remains as nice and cute as you are now!" you say looking in his eyes.. i like how he wants to change. He is so nice, WAIT I CALLED HIM CUTE??!! you start to get butterflies and remember how he called you pretty and thoughts start rushing in your brain. "Tom i think its time to go.. see you next week for tutoring?" you say now standing up . "um ok... but you wanna come to the schools water run course? we could run it together.. and Harry of course?" he asked, first he flirts now he's asking me out? "um yeah sure see you tomorrow?" you reply and see him out and fall asleep.