How Does It Make You Feel to Double Back

Chapter 7 - Uncertainty

A/N: Everybody needs to stop giving Monét advice that she's just going to ignore.
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Today was the day I find out two things: 1. When High Luv will be officially released and 2. When I will be getting my new team. I was nervously excited for obvious reasons. Simone was gonna be gone most of the day for a shoot outside of the city so that left me to my own devices.

With two days left until my birthday the anxiety on who I wanted to spend what part of my day with was crippling me and I had no one to talk to about it. Maybe I could talk to Siobhan and convince her to not tell Toya, but those two were joined at the hip so that wasn't very likely, but it was a chance I was willing to take.

"Hey D can we take a break?" I asked wearily as we re-recorded my backgrounds for the thousandth time because I wasn't happy with them.

"Yea. You got something on your mind?" He asked in his usual big brother way, coaxing me to take a seat next to him.

"Yea but I don't wanna drag you into my worries." I lifted my hand and let it plop into my lap.

"Come on Vic. Talk to me. You know I won't judge and whatever you say stays between us." He playfully jabbed at my arm with no amusement returned on my part. I let out an exasperated sigh as my shoulders slumped.

"D I think I may have bitten off more than I can chew and I'm too far gone in the situation for it to be salvaged." My eyes stared a hole into the jeans I was wearing.

"What do you mean by that?" His forearms rested on the chairs armrests hands folded.

I let out another sigh contemplating my words and how much to tell him.

"Tell me everything. We got the studio all day." His eyes stayed on me.

"Ok there's just so much. You know how things between Simone and I have been rocky lately?" I finally look up at his reassuring gaze which made me feel a little less anxious.

"Yes. Let me ask you this, have they been rocky or have you been making them rocky?" he posed the question to me and encouraged me to continue. With a shaky breath I select my words.

"I've been...keeping some things from her for a while now." I fidgeted with my nails chipping away at the acrylic.

"You mean besides the whole not telling her she might not make your team thing?"

His hand touched my knee. "Vic look at me." I peeled my eyes away from my lap and looked back at him. 

"What kind of things?" I hated how I was dragging this out but pacing myself seemed to give me the most control over word vomiting everywhere.

"Something that could absolutely obliterate my relationship." I confessed.

"Ok. I don't have much to go on right now so I don't really know what to say."

I lightly sucked my teeth irritated with myself. "Never mind. Forget I said anything." I said dismissively and pushed my body from the chair. Unfortunately for me D'Mile caught me a pulled me back to my previous position.

"Vic you started this conversation I would appreciate if you finished it." He said sternly almost reprimanding me like a child.

"What's the thing you've been keeping from her?" He kept his hands in the rests of my chair preventing me from sprinting out of the door the way I wanted to.

I really needed to take a moment to get the words together. I focused on the thick metal diamond encrusted silver ring on D'Miles finger.

"Well" I swallow harshly.
"I've umm been romantically entertaining someone else." My voice grew smaller and smaller with every word.