Beautifully Broken ❤️

Confessions Part 2

A/N: Warning Trigger Chapter.

They stood there hugging for the longest time. Kelly closed his eyes as he tried to calm his heart down. Holding her again was stirring up emotions that he wasn't wanting to feel. But he couldn't help it; she was crying, and she looked broken when she revealed what happened to her. He had to hug her; hugging her was always his first instinct. He missed holding her; the feeling that infected him as he held her gave him a sense of calmness and healing. Her coconut shampoo and vanilla fragrance invaded his nose and had his pulse racing. They had spent a lot of time together this past week, talking and laughing, but they never touched, not even accidentally. Man, did she feel incredible in his arms again?

Stella was having the same effects; his intoxicated cologne was driving her crazy. His muscular arms felt incredible around her; she could tell he worked out a lot. His embrace felt warm and safe, just like it did when she was younger. God, did she miss this man? She closed her eyes, silently kicking herself for telling him what happened. She didn't want pity; she didn't want him to feel sorry for her. She pulled back after it hit her that the hug lingered a little longer than it should have. She took a deep breath. "I'm sorry."

He wasn't sure if she was sorry for the hug, telling him, or if she was having the same affects as he was. "Sorry for what?"

"Crying in your arms and blurting out what happened to me."

"I'm not sorry." He tells her. "Stella I'm glad you told me, even though I was sort of putting the pieces together and figured something happened. I was thinking of an abusive relationship or a one-night stand with someone who used you or mistreated you. I never thought..." He couldn't even say the word. "You promised to be honest with me about everything tonight; even though I feel bad for pushing you into telling me, I'm so glad you did."

She swallowed hard. "Just my mom and therapist know. Shay doesn't." She gave him an apologetic look. "Shay and I had a long conversation a few nights ago, and I told her everything she wanted to know, but the part about Ryan's father. She said it was fine, and I promised to tell her one day. I honestly didn't think I would ever be ready to tell anyone." She sat down on the couch. "But it feels like a weight has been lifted off me; I actually feel relieved and happy that I told you. It feels good to talk about it and to get it out in the open."

Kelly sat down next to her. There were so many questions he wanted to ask and so much he wanted to say he just didn't want to upset her or anything. He watches her sit there, looking at her hands that's were clapped together, her legs slightly bouncing, she was nervous, she wasn't looking at him, she was biting her bottom lip hard. He could tell she wanted to pretend she was okay, and talking about what happened didn't bother her, but it does. She wasn't mentally prepared for this conversation. She was forcing herself to talk to him about this, and he didn't want her to force herself to do anything. "Stella, you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to tell me. I'm not going to be mad or angry. I just wanted to know what happened these past eight years. I missed my.... friend." Friend—did he really say friend? What the hell is wrong with him? He missed her more than a friend; God, she is all that is on his mind all the time. Why can't he just say I'm still in love with you? I miss what we had, what we were, and what we were supposed to be. I miss my person, my soulmate, and my other half. He quit dreaming the day he lost her; he felt his world going out of control; everything was spinning, and he couldn't balance it. Now she's back, and he feels awaken in the best way. All his feelings are coming back to the surface stronger than ever. But instead of saying I miss you, I love you. I need you back in my life so I can start to fully heal again. He said I miss my friend, and then again, maybe, just maybe that's what he should have said. Being her friend again and building up their friendship again is just what he needs to get her back. He knows she hasn't had it easy the last few years, and there is so much they need to talk about, so much he wants to know. But he's not going to force her; he wants her to open up to him. On her time, even if he had to wait longer, getting her back as his friend is the start of getting her back as his; at least he hopes so. If she wants to ever be his again, he knows he wants her too. It's all he ever wanted.