Prose Red, Violent Blue

Depression

Dedicated to UngracefulOtakuXD
(Although you probably won't give any shit about this.)

Ever since the day
That you went away
I've been sinking deep
Haven't gotten any sleep.

Stayed up late just thinking of you
And all those things we used to do
It makes me feel so pathetic
Cause I've no way of knowing
If you even miss me too.

From what you've let me see
It don't seem that way to me.
Every day I'm feeling haunted
I'm sorry I couldn't be who you wanted.

Empty promises, shattered dreams of love
Guess what I gave you wasn't enough.
We used to say 'Forever'
Used to fly so high
Think I'll miss you forever
Like the stars miss the sun
In the morning sky.

Even though I tried so hard
Now my soul is scarred
And I'm beginning to feel like such a retard.
These days, you seem kinda sad
But what right do I have
To care about that?

I used to be fine with us being friends
I tried so hard to make amends
I don't even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger
And it feels so rough.

I seem happy, right?
You see no cuts on my wrists
Only the smile on my dry,cracked lips
You hear me laugh, you see me smile
But did you take the time
To look into my eyes?
Did you see the emptiness, the darkness?
If you'd see what was in my mind
You'd know,sweetie,
That I'm dying inside.

Those monsters my parents used to warn me about
They're not under the bed
Or under the couch.
If you took the time, you'd find
That they're all inside your mind.

It's easy for them to say
But how do I forget you
When I see you every day?
I don't hate you for leaving me
I don't hate myself for loving you
I just hate myself for not being able
To stop missing you.

You said you wanted to stay friends
I said I'd like that a lot
But are we even friends
If we never talk?

I waited and waited
For minutes
For hours
For days
But all I had was silence.
And with the absence of your words, I took it as an answer.

I loved,
You didn't.
I tried,
You didn't.
I cried,
You didn't.
You hated,
I didn't.
You left,
I didn't.

What use are all the breakup songs
When they make me feel all wrong?
I still sing them, even though every verse
Just makes me feel worse.

Even though you're probably never going to read this,
I hope at least you get the gist.
They were right when they said
The only ones awake at 3 am
Are the loved
And the lonely.
The ones who've knelt down and cried,
The ones who've lost the will to fight.

And to the person I dedicated this to,
Sumimasen, gomendasai,
Sorry for disturbing your life.

A/N: Hi guys, I'm back.As you can tell, I'm haven't been feeling quite happy of late.
Regardless, sorry for the months-long hiatus and hope you guys like this new one.
Pandarius, signing out for now.